Run To You (Book 3)

Twenty

(Photo is Amber Lynn)
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MITCH

I set Amber down in her pink crib as she yawned. She stuck her thumb into her mouth as I turned on her mobile above her. It started playing soothing music and she drifted off to sleep.

I went out to the living room and saw Scott sitting on the couch with Dani, "Did she fall asleep?" He asked me as he stood up.

"She's fast asleep Scotty. It's so cute."

"Aw poor girl. She was so tired." He kissed me gently as we sat down together watching a movie with Daniel.
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"Dinner was so good daddy." Dani explained to me how good dinner was and what he loved most about it.

"Well I'm glad you enjoyed it sweetie. Ice cream time?" I asked him and he jumped out of his chair and ran to the freezer with Scott.

They had their ice cream and we put Dani to bed, "Scotty."

"Yes honey?" We were laying in bed and I was slowly drifting off to sleep.

"I love you."

"I love you too babe." He kissed me gently and I felt sick immediately as he put his arm around my waist.

I jumped up and ran to the bathroom. I threw up for hours till I had nothing left to vomit. Scott came in at 6 am when I got out of the shower, "You okay yet?"

"I'm fine Scotty. Don't worry." I got dressed and got Amber out of bed when she woke up. I got a bottle and formula. I smelled something nasty and then realized she had poop all down her leg. I was disgusted, "Scott."

"Yeah?" He asked before he took one look at her and grabbed her from me. Ew is all I have to say.
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"Are you okay?" I had been up all night, again, throwing up. I was so sick. But I knew that already.

"No! Leave me alone Scott. I don't want you to see me like this!" I slammed the bathroom door shut as he went to stop me. I locked the door and sat up against the wall across from the toilet. I felt so bad. Not only physically, but mentally.

I wanted this to stop. All of it. I hadn't even started chemo yet. I'm dying and no one cares. Maybe I shouldn't either. Cancer is just such a terrible way to go. I wish someone could put me out of my misery already.

I was finished with my mini breakdown so I opened the door. I went into my room and saw Scott sitting on the edge of the bed, "Scotty?" I walked over to him and he turned away, "Scott. I'm so sorry baby."

"I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at myself." He held his face in his hands and turned towards me. I held him in my arms as he cried on my chest.

"Why honey?"

"I'm acting like nothing is wrong with you. I'm not pushing for your chemo to go through or helping you out around the house enough. I don't understand when you lock yourself in the bathroom because you don't want me to see you. I'm a failure and a bad husband. A terrible one." I lifted his face up and looked him right in his beautiful blue eyes.

"You, are not a terrible husband. You're just in shock still. I understand that you don't want to believe what's happening is really happening, but it is Scott. I'm dying every moment I'm alive. No matter what, unless I get cured somehow. I'm miserable, yes, but that doesn't mean I don't love you, or want you to hold me in your arms as the warmth runs through my sick body. I love you. So much Scotty. You're my best friend and my husband. Forever. Till the day I die." I wiped the tears off my face and sat up as Scott regained himself.

"I'm just so sorry Mitchy. Really sorry." He wiped his face and leaned in, placing his lips on mine. I pulled away and brought him in for a long hug. We soon fell asleep, in each other's arms.