Good Omens Oneshots

32 (Hastur + IB ish)

If there was such a thing as Olympic level lurking, Hastur would win the gold medal. Ligur would've tied with him, and there would've been two gold medals, but he had been discorporated by holy water. It was a shame, because, demons didn't have friends (or shouldn't, some did in secret) but Hastur and Ligur had been more than acquaintances, though they would never admit it. They were friends. They didn't even know it, and would deny it to themselves, but they enjoyed being around each other which made them friends.

Hastur had been quite annoyed at Crowley for killing his friend, but could do nothing about it without having to admit they were friends, so he was lurking. He had no reason to, and knew it was pointless, but he was doing it anyway. He was on the street outside his flat building, and it was about half eleven at night. Aziraphale had gone in with Crowley, and still hadn't come out, and Hastur envied their friendship. He considered killing Aziraphale to give Crowley the same amount of pain he had given him, but (although a demon wouldn't normally think this kindly) no one deserved the pain he had gone through.

After a few hours and no more activity, he sunk into the ground, going back down to Hell. He walked to his room, you might not think demons have rooms, but they do. The rooms don't have beds or anything comfortable, and are rather small, but they're just somewhere for the demons to go so they weren't in the way. What else would they do? (Hastur's had been next to Ligur's.) When they entered, they got a few minutes of peace before there was a knock at the door.

Beelzebub didn't wait before entering. "Where were you?" They asked sternly.

"Lurking." Hastur simply said.

"You do that a lot." The prince of Hell stated. "Where? What were you doing that would benefit our Lord?"

"I was outside where Crowley lives." He said. He didn't want to say how upset he was that Ligur was gone, because he didn't think Beelzebub would understand.

"Is it because you're angry at him for what happened with Ligur?" They asked, guessing surprisingly accurately. When Hastur told them what happened to Ligur, they had realised how upset he was. Hastur nodded solemnly. "Sorry but you can't do anything to him. Everyone wants to keep him alive, because according to upstairs he's 'important' for the Plan. Besides, he's immune to holy water." They said a bit gentler. Again, they seemed to know exactly what Hastur was thinking.

He just stood silent, looking at the floor. He was a demon, which meant he always looked fairly moody anyway, but somehow, he looked even more depressed than usual. Beelzebub slackened off their usual demonic stance to a more soft and understanding one which involved leaning against the wall. They thought for a minute, they couldn't be too nice, but needed to say something that was right.

"Have tomorrow off." They eventually suggested. Hastur sat down into the one simple wooden chair in the room, still staring at the ground. He wasn't paying much attention to Beelzebub, and didn't have the motivation to stand anymore. As he sat, he stopped supporting himself completely, and his sudden weight made the chair move back a bit, creating a horrible sound against the floor. Beelzebub couldn't have their demons so depressed. Especially not the Duke. They sighed quietly because more action would be needed to sort this out. They hated having to get understanding and kind because that was the opposite of what demons were supposed to be. "Ok?" They asked, as a question, quietly. "You good?" They asked, really hoping he'd pull himself together. He didn't.

They walked the few steps to the chair and poked his shoulder gently, getting his attention. Hastur looked up, and looked sadder than they had ever seen anyone. They forced themselves to smile weakly at him, trying to give the same smile they gave to Gabriel so often. "Have tomorrow off, and I'll check on you before making you go back to work." They said quietly. This time, Hastur nodded,

"I miss Ligur." He said, maybe whispered, probably muttered.

"I know, but I can't do anything about it. Juzt... talk to someone about it." They said. Before leaving. They really weren't good at doing that sort of thing, and decided they would send Dagon down later. They certainly couldn't have him discorporating himself, because then there would be no Dukes of Hell left. That would be complicated. Maybe they should shout at Crowley to apologise, but what good would that do? They arrived back at their office to find Gabriel with Dagon shouting at them, and Gabriel trying to act all innocent. Typical.

"Dagon." They said, taking charge.

"I found him in your office." Dagon stated, Gabriel just rolled his eyes, and Beelzebub had to try so hard not to grin or laugh at him. He was so stupid.

"Whatever, go and talk to Hastur." They said, "I'll deal with him." They added, nodding at Gabriel. They were going to deal with him in a completely different way Dagon would think, and they loved that little secret.

A/N
It's quite short, but I had no other ideas, so please send some requests because I am struggling for ideas. Anyway thx for reading. (Word count: 903)