Good Omens Oneshots

49

Beelzebub was on Earth, they hated Earth apart from the fact it was a good place to meet with Gabriel. Sadly, they weren't meeting with Gabriel today, instead, they were going to try and convince the Antichrist to restart the apocalypse. They weren't expecting to be able to, but they had to do something to settle down the rest of Hell.

They knew where the Antichrist was, they could sense him like a human can sense the temperature. You just know whether it is a hot, cold or in-the-middle day. He was in the forest next to Tadfield - where he lived. They raised out of the ground, in a way that was like sinking but in reverse, and brushed the autumn leaves off their shoulders. They quite liked being dirty, it was sort of their style, but they couldn't just go around with leaves all over them without raising extra suspicions. They could easily make the humans think past it, but it took more effort than simply getting rid of the leaves altogether.

They heard some yelling, the yelling and laughter of children, and started walking towards it. Why was the Antichrist so normal? So happy? He shouldn't be; something had definitely gone wrong in him at some point. What was his name again? Names were difficult, so human and typical, so repetitive. They liked their name though.

"Adam Young." They called once he came into sight. The boy looked up, and his 3 friends (who had for some reason forgotten the events of armageddon't) looked confused. Slight dread was in the Antichrist's eyes, but it was also slight annoyance at the interruption.

"Hello Beelzebub." He greeted cheerily once they got even closer, and stopped walking altogether once they were only a meter away.

"I'm here to try and—" Beelzebub started, but they were interrupted.

"Who are you?" Pepper asked. Beelzebub rolled their eyes, they wanted to get this over and done with as quickly as possible and this was not helping.

"To try and convince you to—" they were cut off again. Bloody children. Maybe they should try this in a few years time, when Adam had grown up a bit, along with his friends.

"I asked who you are." Pepper said. She was too confident with herself. Beelzebub gave her a glare. It was a glare that had the fear of Satan in it, and it shut her up.

"And convince you to rethink your—" were they ever going to be able to finish this sentence?

"Why is your name Beelzebub, when you're the Lord of Flies, not Bees?" Adam asked. Beelzebub's eyebrows furrowed. What kind of a question was that?

"What?" They asked. They were not enjoying this so far.

"Well, I did some research about you and—" Adam started, but Beelzebub dared to interrupt the Antichrist, the Adversary, Destroyer of worlds, King of darkness, son of Satan.

"Whatever. I came—" apparently he had something against Beelzebub talking.

"Do you have fly wings or normal demons wings?" He asked. He received another glare but was not phased. "If there are six other princes then why are you the one in charge?"

Beelzebub folded their arms. Questioning things was what had made them a demon in the first place, but they weren't enjoying this. Stupid boy. He asked a few other stupid questions.

"Anyway, why are you here?" He asked as if Beelzebub hadn't already tried to explain. They sighed, annoyedly.

"Basically to ask if you'll restart the apocalypse." They said, they couldn't be bothered with all the proper form of asking properly.

"I already said no." He replied, without a second thought.

"Whatever, I need to be able to tell the rest of Hell I'm doing something, that's all." Beelzebub explained uncaringly. It was worthless trying to hide it. They turned and left. They hated children. They hated everyone. They hated humans; humans had influenced the Antichrist to be like this. They also hated the demons and angels (apart from Gabriel, of course). But they were made to hate, they were a demon after all, so there was no surprise there.

A/N
Almost on chapter 50, so that's cool. Thx for reading. (Word count: 701)