Good Omens Oneshots

45 (IB)

The sunset was long, and the half light was supplying the small countryside village to be pleasantly warm after a sweltering day. The village was a beautiful one, which, like the neighbouring village Tadfield, had escaped any modern changes, making the scene picturesque. They knew why, of course, it was the antichrist that made the weather so perfect, and the scenery of fields so well grown. They hadn't understood his actions before, but now they did.

Beelzebub and Gabriel were walking side by side, on a footpath next to a quiet road. Not hans in hand though, they would not dare that in case the antichrist was somewhere around and saw, because he only lived a few miles away. Any miracles for Adam to un-see things wouldn't work because of his power — even if he wasn't going to use it.

The sun was bright, and shining generously all around the village, and onto the angel and demon. Beelzebub hated it, it hurt their eyes and seemed too happy when so much was bad. They preferred the bad. They also hated how it made Gabriel look so much more angelic. He was an angel, of course, but they despised angels. They loved this one, but felt hate for any other; especially the ones that made Gabriel constantly busy. They were often busy themselves but the point was still there.

There weren't many other people in the quiet settlement, but it seemed like a happy community. There was a church, which Beelzebub had reluctantly got past; why would the path outside a church be consecrated? And now, they could see a vicar they were about to walk past.

Beelzebub put their head down, and tried to stay on the side of path where they were furthest away from him. Gabriel tried to be a bit less suspicious so he just smiled politely when they approached each other more.

The vicar was in a good mood, which was bad for the demon. "Bless you." He said, aimed towards Gabriel for his smile. That was close, the angel and demon simultaneously thought, "Bless you both." He said. It was not close anymore it was past.

Beelzebub's boils, which they had previously been hiding came out, and their legs gave in. Gabriel caught them before they could fall, and laid them down on the ground against his kneeling self.

"Fuck it" Beelzebub yelled, trying to make the burning inside them disappear. It burned, and they could feel the searing sensation travel through them.

"What is happening? Is she alright?" Asked the vicar as he rushed towards them hoping to help. Beelzebub's boils were worsening by the second and spreading a bit. They needed to get down to Hell so Dagon or some other demon could condemn them and even it out but they couldn't with a human so nearby. Besides, having such a blessed vicar was blocking out their full demonic power.

"How much did you bless them?" Gabriel asked, still attempting a calm state which reassured the demon a little.

"Excuse me?" Asked the vicar, caught off guard with the strange question. Gabriel sighed.

The Archangel noticed how Beelzebub was gritting their teeth and wondered how they were going to have any teeth left after the next few minutes passed. "Let out your wings, it might take some of the strain off." He instructed.

Beelzebub did as they were told and let out the six ebony wings which were surprisingly not fly ones. Their flies had gone quiet, which worried Gabriel a lot.

"What... er." The vicar said unsurely, backing away from the huge feathered wings that had appeared from nowhere.

"I'm going to ask this again," Gabriel started. "How much did you bless them?" He realised it couldn't have been that strong, otherwise Beelzebub would have been dead in an instant.

"Not, er, very strongly." He admitted, still confused. That probably meant Beelzebub would be okay.

"Good." He said. Beelzebub was still in a huge amount of pain, and was nearly unconscious. Their eyes were screwed together, and their breathing was heavy and uneven although they didn't need to breathe. "Leave now, and don't go around blessing demons again." He ordered.

"You are crazy." Stated the vicar, not leaving. "Who are you and what is this fuss about?"

Gabriel internally grinned; he had an opportunity to use his favourite line. "I'm the Archangel fucking Gabriel, now leave." He raised his voice slightly in his overconfidence.

The vicar stood for a moment, not really believing any of it, but left after the moment of hesitation. Gabriel resumed his concentration to the demon. Their wings were spread lazily across the path, and they seemed fully unconscious. Shit, he thought. He couldn't get them to miracle themselves down to Hell, and he wasn't going to take them himself. Besides, he knew it would look highly suspicious if he arrived in Hell with the nearly dead demon, especially such an important one.

He sighed and picked them up. He looked around, but they were in a village and there wasn't much around. The Archangel didn't even know what he was looking for, so he exhaled instead. The demon in his arms was still in pain, he knew, but the main burn would be over. He wondered what he was supposed to do, it would take Beelzebub a few days to recover, but Heaven and Hell would notice if their leaders both disappeared.

He walked a bit, and came across a small hotel. This would do. He went in, and they miraculously had a free room, and for some reason didn't think much if the demon and their wings.

The next few days seemed to blur together. The first two were spent with Gabriel holding Beelzebub waiting for them to wake up, and he hated the feeling that it might take weeks, and they might not at all. He told himself that they were strong though, and that of course they would recover. He had a horrible suspicion that the vicar had blessed them more than he had let on.

On the third day, they had woken up, and Gabriel was relieved beyond what could be described. They were still in a huge amount of pain, and could barely move without more pain. Their everything hurt. They were used to pain though. They rested their head into Gabriel, and slept a little while longer, not looking forward to going back to Hell and having to explain what happened.

By the fourth day, they could move enough to put their wings away, and could distract themselves to concentrate on the time spent with Gabriel. On the fifth, they were mostly recovered — they were strong, and used to pain so they could get better quicker than any normal demon. However, they did not want to return to Hell just yet. They were enjoying the time with Gabriel, despite what had happened, and knew the angel felt the same.

They should've returned to Hell and Heaven, both of them, but didn't. Instead, they spent more time together, until Beelzebub was 100% better, not just better enough. Of course, though, they had been worrying Heaven and Hell.

~in Heaven when Gabriel returned~

"Where were you?" Asked Michael, straight away and sternly, they seemed to have took charge whilst he was gone. Gabriel momentarily hated himself for not thinking up an excuse before returning.

He shrugged and went to his office. He was followed.

"Where were you?" Michael asked again, "you've been gone for 3 weeks." He didn't think it bad been that long. They were the best 3 weeks of his life, he thought. "Answer us."

"Just on Earth, took longer than I thought." He said, not doing a good job of sounding innocent and casual.

"We talked to Hell, Beelzebub was gone too." Uriel said. "Any connection there?"

"No." Gabriel said, perhaps a little too quickly. Michael raised her eyebrow, and they all left.

~in Hell when Beelzebub returned~

Beelzebub walked to their office, receiving a few suspicious glanced from demons. They knew the demons needed them, but didn't care. When they arrived, Dagon was in their office next to their's.

"Where were you?" Dagon asked, entering Beelzebub's office once they had settled down.

"None of your buzzzinezzz now fuck off." They replied, buzzing uncontrollably. Dagon went to leave; Beelzebub's desk was piled high with paperwork.

A/N
Sorry I haven't updated this in a couple of days, but I couldn't think of any ideas. Please send some requests, thx for reading (word count: 1425)