Forki One-Shots

I Turn Life Upside Down

The Christian Contemporary Music zone is a fun, happy are (in the right places), but it also had no room for "imperfection". You had to fit into the mold or be criticized to pieces.

Case in point: Moriah Smallbone

The music has a different sound and you're not screaming Jesus?

SATANIC.

Is that a hint of cleavage?

STRIPPER.

Oh poor Joel. He probably wants a pure and holy Duggar for a wife. God told me he wishes you acted like a woman in the 1820's (ignore his pierced ears though).

So, where would I fit in?

Me, the 15-year-old illegitimate daughter of Joel Smallbone, who was born after he left home and fell in love with some chick at a bar. But then problems arose and he returned home to a perfect life. And then I show up in his life years later after Mommy Dearest gets arrested for home invasion.

I probably just blew his entire reputation up.

On the bright side, I dress "modestly" (t-shirts, hoodies, joggers, and jeans), I don't swear in public, and I don't have face tattoos (hopefully Karen will be okay with my multiple piercings and nose ring).

On the unbright side, my existence means that ½ of for KING & COUNTRY got drunk, had premarital sex, and a baby. Yikes.

Dad/Joel/whatdoicallhim and Moriah were chill about me showing up. David/Grandpa/Ole Bloke, on the other hand, was not.

My bad.

After he stopped yelling at Joel/Dad (because he was wheezing too hard, the old man), David spent the rest of our visit (meant to introduce the rest of the Smallbone's to Joel's mistake) glaring at me, his useless problem causing granddaughter whose only talent was writing decent fanfics about Marvel and Percy Jackson (without letting anyone from her real life find out) and posting pictures of them on Instagram.

Everyone, even Grandma Helen, was chill about it. (Or pretending to be, at least.) They talked to me, did not mention my mother, and treated me like an actual human being.

I was so grateful. Because the truth is...

I'm a fan.

Ever since I heard "Priceless", "Run Wild", and "Matter", I was hooked. Their voices (the accents make me weak, y'all), their faces (literal angels), ,their sweetness (cupcakes got nothing on you)...I was obsessed. Marvel and Percy Jackson level obsessed. (Please don't let them find out. I don't know what to do.)

Of course, I can't let them know.

That would be awkward.

Real awkward.