Confusion (Sequel to I Wish...)

Chapter 13

Chapter song: Bed of Lies by Nicki Minaj feat. Skylar Grey
(Justin's pov)
I tugged on her shirt, but she pulled it back, signaling she didn't want her shirt off. I respect that, so I laid her on the bed. I unzipped her pants and pulled them off. She had a few bruises and scratches, but she might've been careless. She's like that now. I put my hand in her panties and rubbed her pussy, making her moan. I kissed her while slipping a finger inside her. Her moaning increased as I pumped 2 fingers inside her. Her moans were desperate, and she let me kiss her neck. Her moaning got louder as she reached her high. I put on a condom and started to slide myself inside her. She moaned loudly and signaled that it hurt her. I forgot that she was no Selena. I took myself out and started to enter her slowly.
"Breathe"
I whispered in her ear. She pressed me tightly to her and whimpered.
"It's ok, baby"
Oops, that word accidentally slipped out. Becca didn't seem to mind. Once I had myself inside her, I started moving slowly. She moaned and moaned louder as I went faster. We were both in our own minds as we moaned and groaned in pleasure. She moaned her loudest as she released herself. I slowed down and took myself out of her. We both were panting, and she closed her eyes beside me. I pulled her in and held her as if she were mine.
. . .
When I woke up, Becca was muttering to herself.
"What are you doing, bae?"
I sat up tiredly.
"I shouldn't have done that"
She muttered. There was no sign of happiness on her face. Shit, I let it happen again. I got caught up in my imagination with her and ended up fucking her.
"I shouldn't have done that. Justin, you need to leave"
She ordered, appearing to be upset.
"Becca, pleas-"
"Justin, you need to go"
Her voice was rising and filling with regret and anger.
"Ok"
I grabbed my shirt.
"Please go. Dammit, what've I done?"
She started crying to herself.
"Don't cry, Be-"
"Go!"
She slammed the door in my face. I sighed and hit the wall. Dammit. I'm so stupid. How am I gonna fix this? What am I saying? There is no fixing this. It's over. Is it? Fuck. I don't know.
(Becca's pov)
I cried and cried nonstop. How could I let that happen? I had sex with Justin. Justin, the one who broke my heart into tiny pieces and came back thinking he'd get me to love him again. What the fuck is wrong with me? No no no no no. Why?! Why did I just stand there and let that happen? Why did I go along with it? I grabbed the bottle of liquor in the fridge and gulped it down, or at least it felt like most of it. Maybe I can drink the pain away. Just maybe. Before I could sit back up, I passed out on the bed.
-9am-
I felt sick when I awoke, so I puked in the toilet. When I finished, I gulped down a ton of water. Justin's gifts were still on the table. I sighed frustratedly and pushed it all to the floor. I felt so empty inside, so I walked to Max's. Yesterday he gave me a black eye, because he was high and miserable, I guess.
"I called you yesterday"
Max muttered with a scold.
"What?"
My heart dropped.
"I called you. Why didn't you answer?"
He was getting mad.
"I-I was aslee-"
"Quit the fucking lying! What do I have to do to keep you from running your mouth?!"
He gripped my face and slapped me.
"This'll help"
He had duck tape in his hands. I begged him to stop, but he gripped my neck and wrapped the tape around my mouth, getting it in my hair. I cried and whimpered. Max slapped me and hit me repeatedly. He threw whatever he could at me: shoes, beer bottles, soda cans, etc.
"Maybe this'll teach you not to lie to me!"
He grabbed a knife and cut my shoulder. I yelped painfully and cried harder. Blood trickled down my arm as he shoved me against the wall. He furiously ripped the tape off me, taking some of my hair. I was thrown outside, then the door slammed. My face was stinging in pain, and my shoulder hurt like crazy. I stayed on the floor, trying to recover. Finally, I got the strength to stand and walk home. My phone buzzed, and I saw a voice message from Justin. I sighed and listened to it.
"Mmm-yes! Justin, go faster!!-"
It sounded like him and Selena...having sex. I instantly dropped my phone, cracking it. Fuck. Did it hurt me? Yes. Justin's got me going crazy, feeling guilty when it should be him the whole time. I took my cracked phone and bursted into tears. I slammed my apartment door shut and screamed. Fuck Justin! Fuck everything! I cried until my head pounded. I heard a knock at my door and exploded inside out.
"You better get the fuck away before I call the police, you asshole!"
I screamed in tears.
"Becca? It's us, Ryan and Chaz"
Ryan sounded worried. Oh shit. I quickly put on a light coat of makeup before opening the door.
"Sorry, guys"
I mumbled, sniffling in the process.
"It's ok, but what's wrong? Who'd you think we were?"
They walked in and made themselves a home.
"Nobody"
I sat on my bed, trying to calm down.
"Could that "nobody" be Justin?"
Chaz quoted.
"...Maybe"
I sighed and sniffled.
"Damn, you guys are something else. He was pissed when he came over yesterday. The first thing he did was....nevermind"
Chaz waved it off, but I knew.
"Fuck Selena"
I mumbled knowingly.
"...How-"
I tossed my cracked phone to them. They listened to the voice message then sighed.
"Becca, I have a feeling that Justin didn't send this, because he's been mad at himself. He's constantly talking about what a dick he is. I think it was Selena who sent this"
Ryan stated irritably.
"I don't care who it was. Justin can't expect me to like him if he just fucks another girl right after me"
I said too much.
"You guys had sex?"
Chaz and Ryan had surprised expressions.
"It was an accident. I feel like shit for letting him"
I put my head in my hands and regretted ever meeting Justin in the first place.
"Do you love him?"
Ryan asked.
"...I don't know"
I answered truthfully.
"It'll be ok, Becca"
They hugged me.
"Thanks"
I dried my eyes and hugged them back.
"We bought you some tacos if you want some"
They handed me a paper bag. "Thanks again"
I mumbled.
"Anytime. We were wondering if we could crash here?"
They asked hopefully.
"Sure. That's ok"
I nodded. Some company sounds nice.
"Thanks"
They grinned at me. Well, at least I got dinner. I ate 1 taco. I'll save the rest for tomorrow. In the meantime, I need some rest. I set up the air mattress for 3, and we all slipped in. The lights were off now.
"This is actually pretty comfortable"
Chaz spoke in the dark.
"Yea"
I smiled.
"Goodnight"
We all said to each other before it went silent. My throat hurts from screaming, and my body's sore from Max. Speaking of Max, I wanna go back to him. I know he hurts me, but that doesn't mean I don't love him.

(A/N: The part you've been waiting for is coming up😏 posting Wednesday)

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