Accepted [Billie Eilish AU] [✅Completed]

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Billie POV

There was silence as me and AG drove back home from the hospital. She hasn't said anything since she was told the news. She just looked at the doctor emotionless and walked out of the doctor's room.

Her eyes were focused on the road as her left hand held the steering wheel and her right hand laid on the armrest. I didn't know whether it was the right time to say anything yet and her phone rang but she didn't pick it up. "A-" I cut myself off and she turns her head looking at me.

She looks back at the road and when we get to the house, she parks sighing, "Say something." I tell her and she turns her head looking at me. "I'm sorry." She says quietly.

"What for?" I tilt my head. "I brought this on myself Billie. I can't blame anyone else." She answers. "Don't say that."

"What am I supposed to tell my mom?" She asks. "Just tell her, it'll all be okay."

"What if it isn't going to be okay?"

"It will, I promise. Don't stress yourself out baby. We'll get through this, I'll be here the whole time." I promise her and she nods. I open the car door and we both get off and I walk over to her intertwining our fingers. 

We walk into her house and she tells me she going to use the bathroom. I let her go and I go into her bedroom stepping on something in the process. I look down and it's a paper with something written on it. 

(A/N: You're about to read AG's note, for the dumb people who won't get it, no shade, when AG says 'friend', she means drugs, once again no shade hehe.)

I don't know who I am, I look in the mirror and my reflection isn't recognizable anymore, sometimes I can't focus, I hear the wrong things, I see the wrong stuff and no one notices something is wrong with me.

Doing drugs was like talking to a friend, the only friend who understood me, I fell in love with this friend when I started finding myself needing their company more and more as months passed by. 

But now I don't need this friend, and I hope this friend realizes I'm not entering their dungeon, their home anymore, I changed my directions, I changed where I'm going. 

I'm disgusted with the person I've become and I'm tired of slacking around instead of doing something about it because I care about who I'm gonna be in the next couple of years. I want to be able to understand myself before I try to understand someone else. 

Someone like Billie. 

People say I deserve to be alone, I deserve unhappiness due to the stupid things I've done, but I shouldn't believe that, I should be happy that I am alive and I'm grateful.

I don't want to go back and see that friend anymore because I know they'd let me right in without a second cause and I don't want that.

I don't want to end up in the same place I ended up in months ago, sitting in a hospital bed, dying, fighting for my life.

If I need to throw up my guts, not sleep at night, and shed tears at the pain, I will. I want to get better and I will get better because I'm me and I know that I can do it and I know that I have people waiting for me to get better.

"Billie, what are you doing?" AG asks me when she exits the bathroom.

"Oh, I found this on the floor, you didn't want me to read it?" I ask her. "It's okay, I wasn't trying to hide anything, it was just a letter to myself." She shrugs it off.

"Hey, it's beautifully written." I tell her and she nods. "I didn't really try." She sits on her bed.

"Your mom isn't here?"

"No, she's in a meeting with a lawyer I think." AG answers. "AG, we haven't spoke about Jason." I realize.

"I don't want to." She states. "I understand but just know that I'm here when you're ready." I remind her.

"What did I ever do to deserve you?" She suddenly asks. "Huh?" I ask.

"You're so good to me even after our situation." She mutters quietly. I crawl onto the bed wrapping my arms around her waist and laying my head on her shoulder. "I love you, that's why?"

She lets out a heartfelt laugh and I smile kissing her cheek and not stopping. "Stop it." She whines. "But I love your baby chubby cheeks."

"I don't have chubby cheeks." She says. "Do you want me to show you the picture?" I ask her and she groans. 

"No, I don't want to see it." She answers. "Too bad." I tell her, I pull out my phone going to the picture and I show it to her.

"I hate you." She mutters and I laugh kissing her lips this time. "Your birthday's coming up." I remind her and she sighs. 

"My Abuela's gonna go crazy, she does that for all of us, don't even get me started on my mom's birthday." AG rants. "I still don't know what I'm getting for your birthday." I tell her.

"I don't want anything." She says and I shake my head. "Nope, I have to. You got me the motorcycle for my birthday." 

"I don't need anything. I have my family and you." 

"You're so soft." I tell her and she grimaces. "No I'm not."

"Can I keep the note?" I ask her and she asks me why. "Cause it's cute and we can look at it years from now." I suggest. She nods and say "Sure, whatever." 

"Thanks." 

Somehow we eventually fall asleep with me on top of AG and her arms around my waist. I get out of her grip and get out of the bed grabbing AG's note and putting it in my pocket. I grab my phone walking outside and dialing Finneas.

"What's up ugly?" I hear his voice. 

"Hey to you too." I laugh a little. "You never usually call me around this time. Is there something wrong?" He asks.

"No, I was just calling to tell that I have a new song idea."

Holaaaa