Accident Prone |h.s|

Chapter 27: Break

June 2020

So apparently you can't do anything of importance when you're pregnant. All I wanted to do was go to the grocery store and I got a very stern talking to about the importance of global pandemics and protecting the baby.

Thank you Harry, I had no idea that viruses are bad for fetuses.

I didn't say I wanted to run a marathon or anything. I just wanted to go pick out some ice cream and avocados.

My morning sickness is finally going away (thank dear baby Jesus for that one), and now I crave the weirdest things. Currently, its chocolate peanut butter ice-cream and avocado toast.

I just want to be an independent and functioning human but that's impossible when the father of my baby is literally blocking me at the front door. Like physically blocking my like a hockey goalie.

I think I'm at the point in this adventure when everything he does, annoys the shit out of me.

For example, I was folding laundry while on the couch earlier today and he decided to hop over the back of the sofa landing in my pile of neatly folded shirts, causing them to fly everywhere. Unable to control my annoyance at this action, I got up and walked out the back door to sit outside and decompress.

I think just being in this house for weeks at a time has finally gotten to me. I feel like I have no actual purpose besides being pregnant. Sometimes it feels like its my only personality trait.

I think I would be in a better mood if I was allowed to forget about it a little but its impossible with Harry. Whether its prenatal yoga or awful green smoothies, he seems to find the most irritating activities for me to do. In my mind, pregnant people are supposed to be given their cravings as they lounge and create life but unfortunately that's not the case in the Styles household.

I may or may not be on the brink of an emotional breakdown.

I'm thanking my lucky stars that Kim is coming over later because I just need someone else to talk to. She still doesn't know that this baby is Harry's and I don't plan on telling her. Although, I have no idea how I'm going to make that believable with Harry sticking to me like glue.

I might have to send him on a pregnancy errand so that he's out of the house for awhile.

I know I sound ungrateful. I know.

He has been so supportive and has gone above and beyond whatever could be expected of him. But I just feel like an oven and not a person. Like he likes me for my uterus and not for me.

Before this whole ordeal, we were just best friends. We could joke and talk and have fun with each other. But now its like the whole world revolves around pregnancy. I just want to pretend that it isn't a thing for a little bit.

I'm currently currently lounging by the pool enjoying the ridiculous amount of sunshine that summer in California brings. Nearly drifting off to sleep when a shadow blocks the sun from my face. I squint as I look up to see Harry standing over me with a bottle of sunblock in his hands.

"Time to reapply, yeah?" He asks while he waits for no reply and plops a large amount of it on my back as its faced towards the sun.

His guitar calloused hands massage the lotion onto my skin as I lay there and try to reign in my annoyance.

He's just being nice. He's just being nice. We don't yell at our friends when they're being nice.

Harry sets a class of iced tea next to me and brings one of the lounge chairs close to my side. He hums what I think is Sweet Baby James by James Taylor as his eyes close and he leans back in his chair. A moment later, a hand gently pushes my hair out of my face that's turned toward him. The action sets off some weird emotion that makes my eyes tear up. It was just so sweet.