Commitment

Part 3

Three days later, Sam, Gray and Loretta Cardozo moved in. They may have all been members of the same family, but they were so, so different. Different temperaments, different characters, different build, different personalities. Different attitudes to Regan.

Regan was starting to wonder whether Jenny had completely misread the situation. Loretta didn't look to be the least bit interested in the farm when Regan took them on a tour of the farm's buildings. Loretta was fashionably dressed. Her hair was styled, her nails were well manicured and polished. She didn't look as if she was vaguely interested in doing anything that involved manual work. And working on the farm involved mostly manual work. Surreptitiously, Regan glanced across at Loretta. Loretta seemed bored. You'd hardly have guessed that she had suffered any trauma at all. She looked cool and composed, and beautifully turned out. Regan accepted that Loretta would not be happy on the farm, but at least she was calm and respected the fact she had a home.

The difference between Gray and Loretta was the fact that Gray, barely spoke to Regan. Regan was sure she could count on one hand, the number of times he has actually initiation a conversation with her about the farm, which was a problem as he was going to work the farm, alone, given Loretta's manner and Sam's age. She remembered his insolence when she welcomed him to her farm. She'd tried to be warm and welcoming. But he'd remained taciturn and surly. Regan wasn't sure whether it was the state of the farm or her that he disliked. And his rudeness was unexpected. His eyes seemed to hold her in contempt when she showed them around the barn. His impudence didn't stop her. She kept smiling at him, and kept her tone warm and light, whenever his family engaged in any form of conversation. Her tone and smile didn't appear to appease him in the slightest. He seemed dour and grim. Not a single spark of anything: no interest, curiosity, concern, or fascination made it into his eyes. Regan corrected her analysis, there was a spark of something in his eyes! Scorn mingled with condescension. All directed at her. In any case, not once did he acknowledge her kindness. Not once did he meet her half way. She was working flat out trying to make him feel welcome and he was working flat out trying to make her feel like something smelly caught on the sole of his shoe.

Regan's appraisal of the new family had her turning around to the grandfather, Sam. She smiled. He was delightful! Even from the start, when he arrived at the farmhouse. His eyes crinkled at the corners as he listened to her when she told them about the history of the farm as she showed them to their rooms. He seemed genuinely interested, and openly pleased to be on the farm. His eyes sparkled with happiness when she showed them their rooms and told them they had the run of the house. Regan sighed when she remembered the difference between Sam and Gray. Sam's lips curved into a smile when she made her lame jokes. Not once did Gray's lips kick up into even the faintest trace of a smile when Regan related jokes. Sam either shook his head and smiled or laughed immediately. He was a lovely man, though he looked frail, Regan thought as she continued with her tour to her farm with them in tow. Regan sighed. Sam seemed to be the only one genuinely pleased to be here. Of the three of them Regan liked him the best.

But as she'd shown them around the farm buildings, she noticed that the three had one thing in common. There was a sadness in their eyes. Regan understood, because she'd seen it in many patients. Sorrow. Loss. Confusion. Festering grieve. That look, that emotion in their eyes, had Regan silently promised them, that she would help them. She could pay forward the kindness. Kindness from strangers, not her parents.

Regan was brought up by her parents, but they were two very remote, cold adults, who had mistakenly had conceived a child. If she had been unlucky enough to be left just with them, she was sure she would have been driven to depression, unhappiness and gloom. But life provided a liferaft: Regan had spent many weeks of her school holidays with her maternal grandparents, and they farmed the land beside the Jones house. If it hadn't been for the sisters, Regan felt her life would have been very lonely. The girls lived practically in the middle of nowhere, but close to Regan's grandparent's farm. Regan and the girls became good friends: She had befriended them as much as they had befriended her.