Idols love. A Bang Chan FF

Chapter 17.

You were drinking your coffee in the car that was going to MAMA and you haven't speak a lot these past few days. You were destroyed, but you had to pull your best face on.

Since you were a JYP artist there were high chances that Pandora and Stray kids would be near to each other, if not on the same couch. The girls already said that you'll be in the center to avoid any situation with them. You appreciated their concerns and unconditional love, but you didn't feel well enough to talk to other human beings.

" We're here. Good luck and I hope that you bring an award home" he said and you smiled at him.

Out of the car you become blind due the cameras flashing in your eyes.

" Jesus!" you thought.

Pandora made its way to the red carpet and posed there. It was your first time, but you felt nothing...

Inside, there were a lot of fans exclaiming your group's name and you smiled slightly. They loved you so you loved them back.

Your sit was right next to... stray kids. They were on the left while Itzy was on the right. You sat in the middle as planned.

You tried your best to be cheerful during everyone's performances. Now it was Stray kids's turn. They started with 'God's menu' and after that, 'easy' and 'Top'. You knew their routines since you dated one of the person in that group. You knew every single word to the songs, same as the choreography.

You lip-synced every word and you didn't notice that tears were streaming down. Of course that you appeard on the screen. You didn't care too much.

Idols started to take interest on your messy situation and Itzy tried to talk to you. You didn't think that the fact that you and Chan broke up was a secret among the idols. Everyone knew you too were dating.

You decided to be professional so you took away those tears and started to "have" fun. Kind of hard to do since your ex was reminding you of all those moments together spent practicing and kissing at JYPE.

" Y/n, let's go to the bathroom.. you don't have to see this." Nayla said and you refused.

" I'm at work, I should stop being a baby." you said miming Changbin's rap.

When they were done performing you clapped as everyone else did. They were your co-workers and they are really good at their job.

You guys were called to go get ready and in the backstage they were returning to their sit. You walked past them like a confident queen even though you were really heartbroken.

Before getting on the stage you guys hugged and it was the warmest hug that you have received in the last few day.

When the music started, you had so much to expel out of your body and that caused you to have the best stage presence that you've ever had (you are very charismatic) and your vocals were amazing. After your routine everyone applauded, but your eyes somehow landed on one peron.. him. He was looking proud, as he did when you two were dating. He used to stare at you with that face all the time. Your heart ached and shivers came down your spine, your hands were shaky.. all of that because of the pain caused in a few seconds. Off stage you fell down and cried your eyes out. Everyone looked at you worried, eventually understanding what happened. There was idols around you and they were comforting you.

You got up after a few minutes, the girls were already back to their sits because it would've looked weird that the members weren't back. You went to the bathroom and thanked God that your make-up wasn't destroyed. You adjusted your face a bit and when you got back the girls asked you how you were doing, you answered a " I'm fine", but you weren't fine.

The rest of the night you had this damn fake smile on. This was way worse than usual. Your heart ached constantly, but fortunately the night was almost over. Only the rewards had to be given.

After a few awards it was 'album of the year'. Both Pandora and Stray kids were nominated, but they ended up winning it. You got up and applauded they success. Chan looked at you for a second and you felt everything coming back. You remembered that he wantes to get this award more than anything... he worked his ass off for it.. You guess that you won't celebrate together tonight.

You sighed and sat down. His speech made you focus only on his mesmerizing voice, the words didn't matter.. you missed his voice.

After a few awards it was time for the thing that you wanted the most when it comes to work. The 'rookie of the year female'. This year was full of debuts and tou hoped that you guys were going to win.

" The winner is... Pandora' Park SeoJoon stated and you got up and smiled for the first time in your night. The girls joined you and hugged before heading to the stage. Nayla took the awards and gave it to you to do the speech.

" First if all.. we want to thank our staff for always being there for us. I personally want to thank PD-nim for making me debut with the best girls in the universe. We thank our fans, only thanks to you this is possible.. thank you so much Hopes. This award means a lot to us. Thank you so much!" you bowed and the rest of the members wanted to say something so you backed up.. your eyes being glues on Bang Chan who gave you a subtle thumb up.. you smiled but that hurt.. again. You felt like you were going insane. You wanted this pain to stop.

You.. wanted to talk to her. The one that he cheated on you with. Not to kill her.. you just wanted to clear the air a bit.