02 | The Maid

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Bella

I was washing the dishes in the kitchen, with a melody of my favourite song playing on my lips. I moved my hips, hummed to the melody and did all the kitchen work. That was my favourite way of working without having to worry about anything.

A loud thud of the door made my moves stop as I turned around to see what the matter was.

I rolled my eyes at the sight of my drunk father swaying as he couldn't stand still and tried to find his room. This was not anything new to me.

Every night he used to comeback home late, drunk as hell, never seemed to care about he had a daughter to take care of. Sometimes he used to bring some blond chicks home in the middle of the night. And there I used to wait for him every night, preparing dishes for dinner so that he could come and have something to eat. I always wished for him to comeback home like a real caring dad and have dinner with me, so that I didn't have to eat alone , which I was already used to since 11 years old, since my mom died in a car accident.

I looked at the clock as I dried my hands with a towel. 1AM. This wasn't probably the right time to ask. But I had no other options left.

I walked towards my father's messy room. The door was already opened as I peeked into his room. Smell of drugs and drink littered my nostrils as soon as I peeked into the room. His room never looked decent. Bottles of drink,shoes,socks were all over the floor and his small bed. His shirt lying on the floor and he started to undo his belt,preparing himself for bed.

I gulped against the lump in my throat as I took deep breathe before opening my mouth.

"Dad. My tuition fees?" This was the same question I'd been asking him for many days now. My teacher gave me the last chance to pay the tuition fees in time,otherwise she won't let me enter her classes.

My heart dropped in my stomach and suddenly I wanted to disappear when dad turned around to look at me. At least what more did you expect from a 16 years old kid after seeing his father's eyes bloodshot from drinking way too much. His chest was rising and falling rapidly, sign of him getting extremely mad. Drunk and Angry. Wasn't a good combination at all. Specially when you know you are alone in the house in the middle of the night and no one would be there to stop the uncontrollable person.

He took slow steps towards me. His fist tightening around the black belt which didn't go unnoticed by me.

"You slut! You and your mother are same! Whores running after money." His teeth gritted and jaw clenched as he growled the words.

"No dad- it's my t- tuition fees..I-" and no word came out from my mouth as his hand rose, his black belt making a contact with my skin.

I screamed in agony and fell down on the ground, holding my left arm, trying to ease the pain. But every second, the pain increased as my dad didn't stop hitting my back and arms with his full force. I yearned in pain, aspired him to stop through my cries but he looked like a monster at that time. I kept yearning, tried to stand up and run away but my legs gave up and he took it as a chance to hit my legs with his belt as well. I brought my two hands up, intertwining them together to ask for his forgiveness. "I'm s-soryy- dad I- won't say- anything," I tried to utter words but they hardly came out. I was sure anyone could hear the splashing sound of the belt making contact with every part of my body. I cried , screamed when dad kept hitting the same spot with same energy again and again with his belt. He didn't stop.

Then he stopped. Or maybe I lost my consciousness. I felt numb. I felt nothing. I don't know for how many hours I stayed like that, or for how many hours he hit me. When I opened my eyes, I was lying down on the floor, in the same place, the small drops of my blood coloured the wall beside me and the floor.

I closed my eyes as tears rolled down my cheeks. Cold breeze hitting my face and making my small room cold,coming through the small window beside my mattress. I had numerous memories like this.

"Why did you leave mom? Why don't you take me to you? I feel so lonely. I feel weak. I feel like I worth nothing. Mom, I was so happy when you were with me. Why did you leave me here alone?" I sniffled and wiped my tears. "People are so cruel mom. They are not good. They hurt me. Do you see? I- I am so hurt... " I complained to mom like usual. I used to do the same thing every night. Only if anyone listened to me.

"I act like I am strong but deep down,it kills me mom. The pain increases every day." I cried more, my tears couldn't stop. It hit different when it's mid night.

I hugged my plush pillow closer to my chest and buried my face in it. Only the pillow knew how much I cried every night.

Slowly I got out of the mattress and stepped in the bathroom next to it. I ran the tap, my eyes gazing on myself through the mirror. Hated, pity, sympathy, numb, weak, slut, bitch, whore... Every word kept rushing to my ears. I brought my hands up and clutched my hair in tight grip as I screamed, as loud as I could. I scooped water in my palms and splashed it over my mouth again and again until my whole face became red from splashing water.

Taking a deep breath, I looked up at the mirror again, to see the broken me. I myself felt pity for myself. My eyes were still red from crying. Water surely never helped to erase my past.

Stepping in the room, I set the alarm clock in my small button mobile. It was 3 in the morning. So 4 hours sleep for me. Nothing new.

Ria was coming to pick me up in the morning. My job as the maid would start from tomorrow. I hoped this time I was paid well to repay all the debt of my father.
I wished that mansion could change my life for forever.

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