Chapter 11

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A/N:

*Mention of drug use* Also big chapter
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Slanted writing = thoughts.
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Scotts POV:

We arrive at my apartment after a very long, awkward car ride. After I park the car, I get out of it and walk to Callums side. He's been scrolling through Twitter and before he opens his door, I open it for him. Stretching my arm out to quickly pull the car door open for him, leaving a path for him to get out. He soon notices I'm standing there and looks up from his phone abruptly, his face going red as he looked at me being a gentleman.
"Oh! Sorry... I didn't see you there." He shoots out of the car, apologising as he headed to the apartment block stairs. I laugh nervously, trying to sound like my cheery, usual self.
"Aha, it's no problem." I awkwardly chuckle, as Callum buries his head into his phone again. I can tell he doesn't want to talk to me, it's obvious. He's just as nervous as I am. Who know's what will happen. As we walk up the stairs to my house, the atmosphere is full of silence.

Callums POV:

I look up from my phone once again to see that I'm faced with Scotts door. I can't believe I have to tell him... I've been trying to put it off. I know he can feel the awkward tension because he's trying to act like himself, even though I know he feels nervous. I try to reassure myself, and breathe in and out... it's not hard... just tell him the truth... I can do it... it's easy.
"It's unlocked now." Scott stands in front of my not making eye contact.
"Could I just stay out here for a minute?" Scott looks at me questioningly.
"Want me to stay?" He continues to ignore my stare.
"Um, no. I just need to um breathe. Before we talk." He nods understandably. I see he resists the urge to hug me as he flinchs before going inside. I just want to hold him.

Technically I wan't lying to Scott when I said I wanted to breathe... but there's something else I haven't told him.

Scotts POV:

Callum has been out there for a while. He must be frozen. Or maybe he was afraid... and left? No no. I can't think like this again. I need to believe he's out there, and help him. I grab my coat on the way outside. As I open my door I don't see Callum straight away... I start to panic. Suddenly I hear breathing from around the corner. I turn the corner to see Callum... SMOKING?! He sees me staring at him in shock. I'm half angry, half confused. Why would he need to smoke? But why would he not tell me?! I can't get angry at him again... he's been through enough. Besides, this probably isn't his fault... just his way of coping... like what I used to do.

My angry glare changes to a look of pity and a worried expression. I can tell he's still shocked I found out his little secret. I look down at him, sitting in a ball in a corner, his bony back against a hard, brick wall. I move next to him and slide down the wall, hoping to comfort him.

"Honey, if you were trying to keep your smoking habits a secret, probably not the best idea to smoke right outside my apartment." I giggle to myself cheekily.
"Y-you don't care? That I smoke?" I look at him, not taking him seriously.
"Cal I used to pop pills." I smile at him. "Taking drugs was the only way I could calm myself down. I didn't take anything too crazy... but I took enough." He looks surprised.
"You?! Wait wait. You? Scott fucking major... had a drug addiction?!" He starts laughing hysterically and then notices the calm expression on my face.
"You sound like everyone else I know." He stops laughing and puts a comforting hand on my shoulder, as he breathed in another puff of smoke. "It wasn't exactly an addiction though."
He looks at me, confused. I snatch the cigarette out of his mouth and smash it on the ground, crushing it in the ground.
"Hey! What was that for, loser?" He suddenly snaps to reality. "Sorry..."
"Don't apologise." He looks at me for a second before I continue. "You know, after my coming out, everything felt tough for me. Like I had to live up to the expectations of some flourishing gay guy. I didn't want to wear all pink and learn ballet, because that's what everyone expected. My parents assumed as soon as I said I was gay, that I'd buy tight jeans and skirts, and that I'd wear makeup. But that's the opposite of what I wanted. I wanted to stand out a bit, but not enough to confuse people. So I thought of the most "edgy", "non-girly", thing I could do... drugs." Callum hugs me for a second.
"So you know how I feel?" He sighs.
"Yep. Pills were my coping mechanism, they helped me to distress and just not feel anything. It continued for about a year until... I was at Lauren's house. I forgot my stash and I needed something, so I asked for her panadol. She had no idea about my addiction... until she found me passed out in the bathroom and I was rushed to hospital. They pumped my stomach and that kind of steered me away from taking drugs again. I only drink liquid medicine now... if I saw another pill... I don't know what I would do."
"You said it wasn't an addiction?" He asked.
"Well that was a lie." He smiled sadly.
"Hey, you know I'll always be here for you. No matter how much we fight or argue. No matter our opinions." I smile at him back.
"Of course, and the same from me to you." I put my hand behind his back between the wall and him, and I rub his back calmly.
"Scott." I look into his calming eyes, although he's nervous, I know his next words. "I feel like I could tell you anything. Like, you're my best friend... but you're also... the guy I'm in love with."
"Wow! How long did that take you?!" He looks at me, a bit offended.
"Excuse me?"

Callums POV:

I'm offended! I just told him my feelings and he made a joke out of them! I thought we had a moment, we shared our pasts.

"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry that sounded so rude." He looked down. I stand up and head to his door. I notice it's locked, and Scott has the keys. He also stands up and walks over to me.
"I just told you my feelings and you ask me 'how long it took me'!" I sniff, wiping away my emotions.
"Well I assumed you liked me and just didn't know how to tell me. You've been acting weird and blushing and laughing at my stupid jokes." We both let out a single tear, and it's then I realise he likes me too.
"Wait do you-" I'm cut off suddenly.
Scott walks closer to me and pins me up against the locked door. We're the same height so it's easy to see him. Without warning he presses his warm lips against mine, our tears merging and becoming one. He wraps his arms around my small waist and squeezes my hips, as I cup his face with my hands and then placing my arms around his neck. Our bodies move in unison, and I've never felt more safe than in this moment. He is a bloody good kisser. Suddenly I realise, I'm making out with my best friend. He abruptly breaks the kiss, our faces inches apart, as we smile at each other.
"Cal, I never got to tell you but now seems like the right moment." He knows what's coming. "I love you Callum Peter Knight. Wanna be my boyfriend?" I'm in a state of euphoria right now, and whether it's the smoking or his kiss... I'm high right now.

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