Love Letters to You [On Hold]

eighteen.

Entry #18
November 12th, 2034

I had to take a break from you.

After the whole altercation with the gun, I decided that being away from you would be a good thing. But I didn't mean for a long time because I don't want to think about going a long time without you. Besides, we have our evaluation in a few days and I promised I'd skip with you, so I'll eventually have to face you.

I told Prim about what happened. She was really surprised and she got really sad over it. More sad than I was when it happened. She burst into tears and sobbed like she had just lost a loved one, but no, it was because you shot me. "That's horrible, Cal! I can't believe he would do that to you."

I couldn't believe it either, but I've decided that I shouldn't try to believe it. I should just let it be and move on, because it's not like you were trying to shoot me on purpose. It was an accident. An accident I was willing to let go of.

Dad barged into a room with one of those hope-I'm-not-interrupting-but-I-really-wanted-to-interrupt-to-see-what-you-were-doing faces. He's been more lenient with letting Prim stay in my room with the door closed because he believes we're having sex, even though all we do is talk about our relationship problems.

"What are you two up to?" He asked us.

"Nothing," I said, because I wasn't in the mood to listen to my dad's antics today.

He gave us a skeptical look. "You guys have been using condoms, right? I don't want little Cals running around here."

My response was only a nod because I wanted him to go away. And he did, eventually, after he supplied us with another handful of condoms.

"Your dad is really..." Prim started to say.

She didn't need to finish, because I knew it was most likely true. "I know."

Prim is more easy to talk to than Dana, because Dana always has a strong opinion about something and she will never let anyone sway her mindset. Like now, I think she's avoiding me because I'm dating you, and she warned me not to because it wouldn't end in anything good. I believe her, but I can't imagine not being with you.

But Prim doesn't judge me, and maybe it's because I don't judge her. She supports everything I do and I do the same, because I think that's what real friends are supposed to be.

After we talked for a really long time, Prim had to go home. As soon as she left, my mother came up to me with her hands on her hips. "I don't like that girl," she said in such a dry voice.

"Why? Prim is really nice."

She made a disgusted face. "She doesn't look like anything good. She smiles in your face and talks about you behind your back. That's how all those rich people are."

I know she was wrong. Prim is nothing like that. But I didn't plan to argue with my mother.

"Cal."

"Yes, mom?"

"That boy over there. The one who moved next door to us. I find him a little fishy."

That raised my interest. The day you moved in, my mom insisted that I became friends with you. Now she was taking it all back? "What do you mean by fishy?"

"I heard he came from up north," she said and I knew this would be another dilemma.

Nothing good ever comes from people "up north". No one really knows the exact reasons, but everyone says people "up north" are filthy. The north is known for a lot of corruption and fraud dealing with money and pretty much everything else. They exploit anything they can get their hands on just because they can and just because they're from "up north."

When the King was trying to get homosexuality banned, there was a lot of uproar from the north, who had supported it. So I guess it's safe to say that most of the northerners are dead now because they don't know how to keep quiet.

But I refuse to believe that you're trying to use me, because I can't think of anything you would want to use me for.

But if you're really from "up north", then that would probably explain why you always want to put yourself and me in danger. It comes naturally to you, I guess.

So, which brings me to wonder ... Why would a person from "up north" want to move to the south?