Spilling Guts

Part 37 - Chasing Sleep

Will had called it a day by five thirty and left Beni and Reese distracted by a nugget of morality. His body had ached, pining for a place to be horizontal. He had slipped on his jacket, patted the pocket for the clink of keys, because he would drive himself home this time, and left. On his way out, Will stopped by the actual Patent office on the main floor of the Novak Tower and reconfirmed that he would be coming in the next morning for his "desk job". The manager of the Patent Office, Nilda Najarro, promised to meet him the next morning to help him blend in.

Waiting at a stoplight Will mentally tallied the progress he had made. His whole inbox, done. A visit with Balcuwitz, done. One more day until Jacob arrived, almost done. He had to set out the outfit he would wear tomorrow.

He hadn't gotten to the list of boundaries Balcuwitz wanted him to write down, but he had written a reminder. In absence of trusted memory, Will had a stack of small notes and post-its in his pocket.

Clouds cut the sunlight into patches of light and dark, making Will squint. Perhaps he should invest in a pair of sunglasses of his own.

His stomach growled. Priorities. Forget sunglasses, he needed food. The hunger pangs in Will's stomach grew, pawing at him like a needy kitten. He pressed in under his ribs with a fist until the light turned green.

Two turns away from his apartment, the sunlight flickered in the clouds again, blinding him in nature's offbeat Morse code. He squinted and rearranged the sun visor.

A person stood in the street, right in front of his car.

Will sucked in a breath and swerved, hitting the break. The bumper avoided the other cars parked at the curb but something under his car dinged against concrete. He sat, gulping air as his heartbeat pounded in his ears and in his chest, feeling squeezed by his own skin. It felt like being swallowed whole by horror.

The cars that had been following behind him blared their horns as they drove around him.

Oh my god, I nearly hit someone. Where did they go? Are they alright? Should I call an ambulance?

Will's hands shook as he turned off the car and pulled off the seatbelt. He got out and looked around. No one.

No body. No smear of blood on the street. No sign of panic except for tire streaks and a few rubbernecking pedestrians that kept walking after shrugging their shoulders.

What had he seen then? Had it been real or an amalgamation of shadows that looked like a person?

I'm seeing things. Damn it.

He should have asked for a ride home. He had been so sure five hours of sleep would get him through the day and home on his own. He was wrong.

Shaken awake by adrenaline, and very aware of every pedestrian and car in his vision, Will slowly drove to his apartment complex. Rather than go in, he walked to the corner drugstore a block away and bought a bottle of melatonin. His body was a temple, but even churches hired professional cleaners. He wanted to get knocked out for the night; let sleep burn away the anxiety of the day.

In his apartment, Will hung his outfit for tomorrow and set his Yoda alarm for seven thirty. Plenty of time to get presentable and align his chakras for whatever the universe tossed his way. Also time to call a ride if he needed it.

If the melatonin couldn't drag him into a black hole, driving was a no go.

After tea and a bowl of chicken ramen (the only thing in cupboard that sparked a tiny bit of nostalgic appetite, even if the package was slightly dusty), Will took two tabs of melatonin and hit the bed. His hunger was sated, but his mind kept spiraling.

What would he talk about with Jacob tomorrow? What boundaries did Balcuwitz expect him to have in the next meeting? Would tomorrow bring another session of teaching Beni and Reese what "good" parenting looked like in typical society? Was ramen a good choice for dinner? That had been for emergencies. Couldn't he have put a few veggies in there? Green tea did not detox as well as people think.

For frack's sake, shut up...

Will yawned and rubbed his eyes. He needed to sleep tonight. He could not face Jacob the next day while at half capacity. That would be akin to fighting against the Death Star without proper shields. Without rest, Red Five would crash, being one with the force or not.

Please, let... me...

Sleep sucked him under the sheets.