Love, Life, Hockey (boyxboy)

Remembering

We don't do much to celebrate except opt for the Chick Fil A drive thru. He's filling me in on all the latest gossip, and stops short when he mentions Kate.

"She was dating Caleb the whole time."

I'm reluctant to say something, but the way I avoid his gaze is telling enough.

"You knew."

After I exhale a deep breath, I reply. "Yeah, yeah I did."

He starts to talk, but I don't let him. "I was trying to protect you."

"I don't need to be sheltered, Hunter."

Ouch.

"You don't know everything, T."

"Whatever."

He starts the engine without a word when he finishes his food. He slams his door without a goodbye when we pull into his driveway.

I don't sleep, my mind is too busy.

I overdose on caffeine trying to get through the next day, and wound up in the trainer's office with a headache and ringing in my ears. I walked to school, and haven't seen Talon all day.

I crash before hockey, and miss practice.

Coach is back, and not happy with me.

"You're not focused. You can't fuck off this season, Flynn. You're better than this."

His words would mean a lot more if I wasn't distracted. He motions me towards the door at the sound of a knock.

I stumble through the parking lot until I have to sit down at the side of the road before I end up in the middle of the street.

It takes me awhile to stand up, and I head towards my house at a snail's pace. It takes almost twice as long as usual. Talon is standing by my front door when I turn the corner. I don't have the energy to argue with him, so I opt to wait until he leaves about 10 minutes later. He probably thinks I'm still at practice.

Good.

I pop a couple of sleeping pills, and wash them down with leftover apple juice from this morning. I should probably eat something, but I head for the couch anyway.

Mom shakes me awake the next morning.

"C'mon sweetheart. Time for school."

I don't feel like wearing jeans, but it's cold out. Opting for sweatpants seems like a good idea. The weather isn't ideal for walking, but it's not like I have another choice. In reality, I do; I'm not ready to face that just yet.

I get about halfway before I realize I'm being followed. I know it's Talon, but I refuse to acknowledge him.

"Get in the damn truck, H."

I keep walking, and he parks the car on the side of the street.

"I will drag your ass into the bed if you don't stop acting childish."

"You're such an adult now, huh? Weren't you afraid of the future just a few days ago?"

"What are you talking about?"

I forgot he was drunk. I'm an idiot.

"Nothing, just forget it."

"It's not that easy."

"You said some stuff the other night, that's all. You told me you were scared of the future."

"That's all?"

I lie. I can't let him know about the kiss. "Yeah, that's it."

"I overreacted."

"Is that an apology?"

"Mhm. Please get in the truck."

"Okay."

We drive to school blasting the radio, and I feel at peace for once.

That doesn't last long. Major gossip surrounds why I missed practice, and I do my best to set the record straight.

I found out at the end of first period that I have a test at the end of the week. It's not a big deal, but I'm gonna need Talon's help if I plan on passing. I don't know if I can ask him based on our relationship the last few days.

Our next game isn't until the weekend, but practice is grueling. I know it's because I missed yesterday.

Talon's getting much better at skating, but I still win every race. "Slow down, show off."

"Nope, never."

I shove him a little, and he loses his balance before falling forward.

I extend my hand, but he pulls me down with him. Actually, on top of him.

Our noses are touching, and I can feel his breath on my face. I get up as quick as I can.

We exit the ice without a word, and I'm thankful for that. The drive home is quiet, and I wish I could know what he's thinking. We head our separate ways with a promise to hang out after dinner.

We do. I feel like every time I'm in his room his stash of hockey magazines multiplies. The latest issue of NHL News sits alone on his bed, so I glance through it as he grabs ice cream from downstairs. Talon arrives at his door with the entire tub and two spoons.

"Lazy."

"Actually, smart."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, T."

We eat in silence, save for the few times our spoons clank together. I'm full after the tub is half gone.

"You lied to me." His tone is serious, unwavering.

"What?"

"I didn't remember that night at all until you mentioned what I said. After that, it became as clear as day."

I don't know if I should run, scream, or cry. I can't lose him.

"I shouldn't have done that."

I can't help my curiosity. "Why did you?"

What he says next is a punch in the face. "I was lonely."

I nod in understanding. "You'll always have me."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

That's the only mention of the kiss before the game.