If Money Could Buy Love (BTS NamjoonxOC) [Forced Marriage AU]

Chapter 46- Part 2

》Iseul's POV

I let Dahyun know that I won't be going to college for a couple of days. I can't, Namjoon will find me too easily. I want to think things through, so that when I see him again we can talk things out without fighting or breaking each other's hearts. I accept that I shouldn't have yelled at him, but I was furious and disappointed.

Namjoon leaves some messages for me, but I don't have the strength to look at them. I turn my phone off completely, leaving it in the spare bedroom Yoongi gave me. Yoongi went to work, leaving me home alone, so I get some coffee ready for myself to sit down and read. Even if I'm not going to college, I will do my work and read the books for the classes.

After an hour I seem to get bored. I look at the classy clock on the wall to see the time and I sigh, time seems to go by slowly. I don't even have Rapmon to play with. Deep down I want to be next to Namjoon and hear him talk. His voice always keeps me calm, and I don't know how he does it, but he manages to make any topic interesting.

I force myself to read and copy down the notes for the class. A while later I stand up and get to my room. I plan to go take a warm shower to calm my nerves, it's not good for me or for the baby. Mostly for the baby, I'm used to the stress. As I go to pick clothing from the closet, a notebook falls to the floor. I pick it up with a frown. The cover has nice flowers and golden lettering. I open it put find that the pages are completely blank. It's basically a new notebook. I remember that Yoongi likes to keep notebooks for his music and I giggle.

There's a knock on the door of my room and my heart skips a beat. Did I leave the door open?

"Iseul, it's me, I left some papers here, Jimin and Hoseok need them right away." I sigh in relief and go to open the door. Yoongi comes into the room and finds me holding the floral notebook.

His cheeks redden, "Oh, um... you found my notebook... If you ask, yes I got it for my music... I thought it looked... pretty, I guess..."

I laugh, watching as he looks down awkwardly and waddles to the small table in the room with some drawers. He opens one and takes out a small bunch of paper. "Lyrics." He says.

I place the notebook on the table and he smiles, "I think you would give that notebook a better use than I will."

I gap at him, "I can use it?"

"Yes, I have a ton of notebooks in that closet cause you know, I can't run out of notebooks. So help yourself. I'm getting dinner for us tonight so make sure you eat well for lunch at least."

Before he leaves I catch up with him to see him go. "Yoongi, nothing spicy please, or greasy..." I say before he goes. He frowns but doesn't question it. He... doesn't know I'm pregnant yet... I'm too nervous to tell anybody yet.

With Yoongi gone I find my way back to my bedroom and sit down on my bed, my gaze landing on the pretty notebook Yoongi has given me. I sigh, grabbing the notebook and a pencil and sitting back down on my bed. I stare at the blank pages for a while. For the first time there's nothing to write about. All I can think about is Namjoon. I want to punch him but I also want to hug him. I love Namjoon... but I am scared of him lying to me again. I can't go back to a life built over lies. I can't go back to my prison, not when I was already flying free.