Tragedy // Luke Hemmings

12

2 weeks later

The surgery didn't go well. It didn't work at all actually, it was a bust. I haven't told anyone, Lex, Luke, no one. Only my mom knows and it's gonna stay that way for a long time. I hated myself because I knew I was going to die within this year. My mom hasn't acted the same since she found out the surgery didn't work. She's positive and happy about everything. She always sees the positive. Me and Luke have been talking non-stop. I only Facetimed him once because I didn't want to see him without my hair. The whole time we Facetimed I had the camera not facing me. He was going to see me soon anyways, so what was the point? Oh shit. I was gonna see Luke soon, like very very soon.

"Julia, Luke and the boys are here!" My mom shouted

Your joking. Of course as soon as I think of them they happen to come. I grab a beanie and put it over my head. I looked like crap, sweatpants and Luke's shirt. I sighed and began to go downstairs. Luke and the boys were on my living room couch watching my mom.

"Hi." I mumbled to them and looked down at my feet, I heard the couch creek as someone got up. Luke pulled my chin up to look at him.

"Hey beautiful."

I grumbled as he said the last part. I wasn't beautiful, no where near it. I was sick, and ugly. I gained at least 20 pounds in the month and a half that Luke has seen me. He probably can't even pick me up on his back anymore. He hugged me tight, I didn't put to much effort into hugging him though. I wasn't in the mood for love. I was dying, what's the point? He looked at me and frowned. Michael came over and hugged me tight, Ashton after him. As for Calum, he just stood on the couch and watched me, my every move. He knew exactly how I was feeling. That's how Calum is, he's that good of a friend that he knew I didn't want to be loved at this moment. He got up after a few moment gave me a quick hug and stood by the other boys. My mom said we should watch a movie so we made our way downstairs. I haven't taken off my beanie since they've been here. I already looked like crap, why make it worst? Mike and Cal decided on some stupid comedy. I sat at the end of the couch, next to Luke. During the movie he grabbed my hand and kissed it.

"I miss you." He whispered

"I missed you too."

"I'm here now."

"Not for long."

He got up looking at me frustrated.

"Why Julia?! Why do you do that?? I'm really trying here, okay?" He was raising his voice. I just shrugged. Everyone had stopped talking and laughing now, all eyes were on me.

"Why are you being like this? Do you not want me here or something?!" He shouted, I sighed and got up.

"No Luke I don't want you here. I told you that, multiple times. You decided to come here not me. Don't expect me to be myself when all your doing is being a complete asshole. I'm fucking dying, okay? I'm not going to act like I was. I'm sad and lonely and really pissed off at myself. Because I dragged all of you in my life. Actually you know what, to make this easier on both of us; let's break up. I'm breaking up with you Luke. Now please go back to wherever you were because I don't need you. We're done. Go home. All of you."

His eyes dropped then. He looked at me, sadly.

"Julia I need-"

"Stop! Stop fucking pitying me, God damn. I don't need you!! And you sure as hell don't need me. Find another girl, that's healthy, and skinny, and pretty, and that will be with you for a long time." I yelled, I was balling my eyes out now. I couldn't even hold it back anymore. The boys looked genuinely sad for me and Luke. I grabbed my beanie and ripped it off my head.