A Pirate Story

Funny Scenarios

Warwick haphazardly throws darts at a dart board in Jack's bar.

"Wick what in the world are ye aiming for?" Sally asks him as his dart nearly takes the head off a customer who walks in shoulders.

"Remind me to never let him borrow my guns." Rachel told Sally and Jack who nod.

Warwick turns to his friends after using up all his darts, not a single one hitting the dart board. 

"Ye call it "really bad at darts" I call it freestyle acupuncture." Warwick states proudly as he sits next to Sally at the bar.

"Warwick, don't make me have to kick ye from the bar." Jack said shaking his head.

**

Warwick happily jumps around in excitement as he and Rachel watch Sally interact with Jim from afar.

An idea suddenly pops into his head and he lowers his binoculars, turning to Rachel who was still watching Sally and Jim through her own.

"Guess what I'm about to get." Warwick told Rachel.
Rachel doesn't even turn to look at him before answering, "On my nerves."

***

Warwick turns to see Sally, Rachel, Jack and Jim staring at him with confused faces.

"How'd that even work?" Rachel asks.

"How'd ye manage to convince him to wear a dress?" Jim asked watching the hairy pirate strut up to a beam.

Rachel and Jack cover Sally and Jim's eyes as the hairy pirate begins acting like a strip with the beam.

Warwick shrugs as he bounces the bag of gold, he won from betting, in his palm, "I say the stupidest s*** imaginable to whoever I want and I just get away with it." Warwick said before turning back to the betting table.

****

"Okay, on my signal we enter, but violence is going to be our last option ok." Sally said turning to her friends as they watched their targets patrol. They were after the boss.

Rachel groans, "Does violence hace to be the last resort? Can't it be like a 2nd?"

Jack, Sally and Jim look at her amused while Warwick hums in agreement.

*****

Sally walks into Jim's room and stands in front of him as he reads his book, lying on his back on his bed.

"Jim, Are ye in the mood for a quickie?" Sally asks innocently.

Jim quickly sits up and spits out his juice. Sally dodges the juice and looks at him in confusion.

"A quickie. Ye know, those egg tarts?"  Sally clarifies confused on his reaction.

Jim coughs, embarrassed, "Sally, it's pronounced QUICHE. Pleas never say quickie again until yer married." Jim pleads grabbing Sally's arms and resting his forehead against hers.

"What's a quickie then?" Sally asks innocently.

"WELL I AM DEFINATELY HUNGRY! LET'S GO GET SOME QUICHE!" Jim shouted as he hung his head down dragging her out his room and to her kitchen.

******

Sally watches Warwick in shock and awe before face palming.  He went on a trip without her, Rachel, Jack, Jim and the crew. 

He claimed he was going to the beach and promised to bring Sally a souvenir. 

Rachel groans in annoyance at how stupid Warwick could be.

"Warwick." Jim said softly shaking his head.

"Yeah?" Warwick asked smiling at them.

"When ye said ye'll bring me back something. I expected a seashell or something." Sally told him worried about him. Jack, Jim and Rachel back up nervously.

Warwick who is struggling to hold a angry seagull, playfully rolls his eyes, "Isn't this better than a dumb old seashell?" He asks Sally as The seagull begins to angry peck the top of his head.

Sally sighs and makes Warwick let go of the seagull's leg allowing it to fly out the window.

"Next time just bring me a seashell or sand dollar." Sally told him as Jack begins to treat his wounds.