Always and Forever

Chapter 64:

I laid there in bed, balled up, crying. I couldn't get past the fact that he was so willing to give his life. And he wasn't even worried about how that would affect me. I was snapped out of my thoughts when the door opened and someone slipped in the room. They shut the door and I heard the lock click. When they stepped into the ray of moonlight I could see their face, Draco. He laid down in the bed next to me. He didn't talk, he didn't try to comfort me, and he didn't try to touch me or anything. It was quiet besides my sobs that slipped past my lips.

DRACO'S POV:

After Skye left I just stood there in the living room, tears streaming down my face. I sunk down onto the couch and Hermione came sit next to me. I didn't look up at her, but she brought her hand to my back, rubbing it. We sat there quietly until she broke the silence, "I get where you're coming from, but I also know where she is coming from." I looked up at her. "Then explain it to me, cause I'm pretty bloody confused."

She sighed, "She's hurt Draco. She's never been loved the way you love her. She already feels like she's not worth much, like she's not worthy to be alive. And you wanting to give yourself over to him and not look back or even ask her how she'd feel about it hurt her more than you'll ever understand. I know her better than anyone, and she'll never let someone do that for her. She'd cut you off from her entirely before she lets your put your life at that much of a risk."

She took a deep breathe and continued, "The way she took it was that you want to hand yourself over to him, that you don't care if you die and leave her and the twins. Draco, when she's not around you, all she does is talk about you. How she loves you, and how she can't live without you. Before you and her fell so deeply in love, hell before y'all started to become friends, she walked around with her head down. As much as she didn't show it, she was struggling."

I looked down. How could I have never noticed it? "She wasn't eating, she never wanted to do anything, she stayed up all hours of the night at my dorm crying, and she had depression. She was as skinny as ever too. She hated herself. She had told herself all the time that she was ugly, not worthy to be alive, not important enough to live, and she started to believe it. Then you came along and she was happy. She ate, she smiled and laughed for the first time in forever, and instead of staying up crying, she was up all night talking about you."

I smiled. I never knew how much of a difference I made in her life. "Draco look at me." I looked up at Hermione and she slightly smiled. "She loves you, and you practically told her you wanted to die. You made the mistake of deciding that what was best was for you to die and leave her. You practically just told her that she's not worthy enough of you. You just told her, without even realizing it, that you'd rather die than live a life with her." My heart was racing. It was all coming to me now, and I started realizing what I just did.

How could I do that to her? I got up and so did Hermione. She gave me a smile and I pulled her in for a hug, "I am so sorry." She pulled away and looked at me. "It's not me you should be saying sorry to. You need to fix this. Not tonight though, let her cry it out and leave her alone. Fix it tomorrow, or I will kill you Malfoy."

I pulled her in for a hug one last time, "I'll fix it, I promise." I left the house and walked to the little house we were staying at. I walked in and closed the door. I didn't know if she was sleeping or not so I walked quietly around the bed. I got in and laid down, our backs to each other. I can't believe I hurt her so badly. Before falling asleep I turned my head, looking at her back and whispered, "I love you Skye, more than you know."