Dance for Me

Chapter 51: Come back to me

Eleanor

Brian squeezed my hand tightly as we both looked to the monitor nervously. Even though Brian had tried to persuade me to see the midwife alone, I refused. As much as I wanted Oscar here holding my hand as we looked to the ultrasound monitor, I needed someone to support me.

"Heck Eleanor, you're about to break my damn hand".

I looked away from the monitor startled by Brian's sudden words in the silent room.

Looking down at our hands, I instantly released my hand from around Brian's unsightly white hand that I was stopping the blood flow all because of my nerves.

"Oh, sorry" I whispered sheepishly smiling at him as he shook his hand.

"Don't worry about it. Everything is going to be alright".

Instead of me holding Brian's hand, he placed both of his around mine and patted the back of my hand.

"Okay Eleanor, the gel will be a little cold, but then we can proceed with the scan".

I nodded at the midwife who walked away from the desk and lifted up my top. I felt tears prick the lining of my eyes seeing the way the midwife and Brian looked at my stomach was the bare skin was revealed.

Scars. Burn marks.

All the torture I endured I kept hidden away from eyes. I couldn't bear the stares, the judgement and the questions. I hated the memories left on my skin. It was a constant reminder of those men and the things they did.

I would never be looked at the same.

"You in there little one, have a badass mother".

Brian must have noticed I was about to cry and jumped in taking my thoughts off the scars.

Smiling at Brian, I wiped away the tears and looked back at the midwife who to my surprise was smiling widely looking like she too was about to cry.

"Are you alright if we proceed?" she asked quietly.

"Yes. Please".

Brian lifted up my hand and placed a gentle kiss on the back of it. Even though he didn't say anything to me, I knew he already knew my thoughts and feelings. It's crazy how simple actions can impact negative thinking.

Even though the scars would stay with me forever, the people that inflicted them were history. I had to be strong for my family.

I winced slightly as the cold jelly touched my skin, but almost instantly relaxed knowing I was about to see my little baby who gave me strength to fight and keep going during the darkest time in my life.

The midwife placed the scanner on my skin and slowly rubbed it over the jelly on my stomach whilst looking at the monitor.

It felt as if time had slowed down as we waited. I had been through so much trauma whilst carrying this little one. What if the baby died and I didn't know. What if-

"Oh my God!" Brian exclaimed.

I looked between him and the monitor wondering what his surprise was, but then I stopped and heard it.

A heartbeat. A steady heartbeat.

My baby is alive.

"Here's your little one".

Brian's grip on my hand tightened as an image came to view.

"Oh my God!" I whispered out almost questioning if what I was seeing was real. I was carrying a baby. Oscar's baby. And they were fine.