My Brother's Girlfriend

CHAPTER22: It Felt Nothing

Mia

I brought my focus to the screen before me. Halle Berry. Looking gorgeous as ever. Okay maybe focus less on beautiful women. I don't think I have enough courage to ask Lauren again. I know she heard me.

"Where is James anyway?" She says. And there's you answer. She's not interested in you. Why would she be? It's not like she's gay. Her eyes found Rex's car. A group of people are surrounded by it but James was not one of them. "I don't know. Probably taking a loo Somewhere. He's like a dog sometimes." I emptied my beer. Just as the ball got stuck in front of thousands of people in New York City. I still think it's a ridiculous choice of movie. I shook my head and wondered who was in charge of the movie picking at this place.

Tonight, Lauren wore jeans instead of shorts. And a blue simple cotton shirt. I wonder what it would feel against my cheeks. I looked down to find our hands clutched and close to each other. My initial reaction would be covering my hands with hers. But of course that would be weird. Should I snag it away? That would be even weirder. I looked up to the owner of the hands to find green eyes already staring back at me. My breath got caught. "I should.." She whispered. "I should go find James." She left my view and walked away. Without any glances. Without another word. I sighed loudly once I'm alone. "Boy, aren't you in trouble." Or so I thought. I turned to see Sarah walking towards me.

"What are you talking about?" I shrugged and tossed her a beer. She caught it with both hands. "You've got a thing for Lauren." She simply said. "What? Ppff. I don't have a thing for Lauren." She leaned her hips in the car. "Except that you do." I didn't look back at her and instead watched two pregnant woman onscreen. How could Sarah Paulson looks hot in that? I can still feel Sarah's eyes on me. "I see the way you look at her, Mia. You've got the hots for her." I looked around to make sure no one heard that ridiculous but true sentence. I covered my eyes. Cannot believe I'm about to confess this to someone. "Alright. Alright. Maybe I have a little thing for Lauren." She gave me a look that says, 'I'm not buying it.' "Fine. I'm crazy about her, okay?" I jumped from the truck and paced around. Thankfully we were at the back where we are isolated from the rest of the crowd. I can already feel my chest tightening. "I think you need this more than I do." Sarah held her beer at me. "No. Water. I need water." She quickly reached at the back of the truck for a bottle and gave it to me. I murmured a thanks and had a healthy swallow. I took a deep breath and felt my pulse slowly going back to normal.

I swiveled around. "Sorry, that was.."

"A panic attack?" She continued my words. "I get those too. Just take it easy." Somehow that made me feel a little bit better. I sat back on the hem of the truck. "It's just driving me crazy, you know? Her. The whole thing. It all feels very new to me."

"Does she feel the same way?" I remembered how her lips felt on my lips. How the curve of her breast pressed against mine and the tingles it crawled from my spine. Her eyes held the same desire. And the fact that she kissed me. She kissed me. "Maybe? I don't know. It's all very complicated. And honestly, I don't know what to do about it. About her." I frowned. "Well you better figure that one out right now." Sarah said. "What? Why?" Her eyes grazed behind me. I looked around to see Lauren stomping away from the drive. Her face dismay and a tear dropped.

I jumped from the truck and tried to catch up with her. "Lauren." She kept walking. "Lauren!" She heard me the second time because she whirled around and presented me with large tears coming down her face. No no no no. I quickly ran in front of her and covered her face with both my palms. "Lauren talk to me. What happened?" She continued crying and held my hand as she leaned in my touch. The sadness in her eyes making me uncomfortable and I don't like this one bit. She shook her head and removed my hands from her cheeks. And just like that, she walked away. Away from my grip.

Lauren

The memory of James locking tongues with Jessica in the back of the drive in still vivid in my mind. How she moaned and said his name. He responded with a firmer kiss and his hands on her waist while she plays with his hair. The hair I used to touch. The lips I used to kiss. The name I used to whisper. Is all right there under the stars. How very romantic. It all felt.. nothing.

I stood there watching them. My mind going numb. My heart beating so fast. I slowly backed away and looked up at the sky. It's so pretty I could cry. But I didn't. Why don't I feel any pain? And why did I see this coming? Of course he's not over his ex. But then again. Why don't I feel any pain? I kept walking. And walking. Until I no longer felt my feet on the ground. And there she was. Mia. In her iconic rainbow cap. How is she even prettier tonight than she did at the restaurant? And just at the thought of her, the tears started rolling down my cheeks. I had to get out of here. Get my feelings together. Because somehow the air tonight felt thick. And my heart ached with confusion. I didn't want Mia to see me, but she did. And as if I could resist her voice, I turned to face her. Being vulnerable as ever. Her gentle touch was enough to make my whole world crumble. Her deep blue eyes holds concern but I still need to get out of here. I reluctantly removed her hands from my face and made my way home.

Now alone in bed. I realized all these feelings. All this time. I did not see this coming. She was not a part of my plan. It's been Mia all along.