Eternal life

Chapter 23

Young Saeng took a sip from the bottle he was holding, while approaching the bathroom. He was squelching through trash pilled on floor: some empty crisps packages, ones from ramen and a lot of empty alcohol bottles.

He was stumbling, obviously drunk. He went to the toilet and came back, again sipping the alcohol. He stood over the phone, with his legs apart for better stand. He checked the hour and it was just afternoon. The date said almost two weeks has passed from the tragic day.

As for the following days after that black-letter day he had no grip with reality. Firstly he was captured by the police, but he didn't even care about it. He got locked, by the same policeman which threatened him. When he got released, he went home to take the cash that he kept to buy something for Aeri and brought it to the shop to purchase the beer and some stronger alcohol. Until now, after the start of new life, he only took some sips of beer, but he just couldn't resist, as many said that he may at least stop fell so shitty about whole situation. He has started a new life and it got destroyed so quickly, that he didn't know what to do anymore.

He stopped going to work, he didn't respond to messages, he wouldn't take care of himself. His hair was dishevelled, the beard and moustache was visible. He reeked alcohol, so whenever he got out from flat, people around him would cover their noses and twist their faces in disgust.

As some thoughts run through his head, he felt a wave of wrath. He hit the wall beside him, which carried some damage already. He hissed as felt pain in the hand. It was swollen and covered in scratches with bruises, alarming that it wasn't the first time.

'Who the fuck are you?! WHY?' He screamed to that damned side as it was at fault, but the wall remained silent. As the gush of anger came all of sudden, it also immediately went away. He was again left with unbearably heavy heart. He sat on the floor hugging his legs and closing his eyes.

Unexpectedly he heard the door being open. He lifted his head, like a dog waiting for his owner to come back. Unfortunately for him it was just Jisoo. She went inside shoving all the trash aside and holding her nose. She brought something in plastic bag and laid it on the table. She stood over miserable Young Saeng.

'This place is in total state. It stinks. You stinks.' She waved her hand around, finally pointing at him.

'You can get used to that.' He send her weak smirk in return.

'Clean it.' Jisoo ordered, since she also was feeling rather blue. She lost her best friend, but she couldn't just shut herself at home and cry.

'Will it change anything?'

She started to walk around the living room lifting up some stuff, trying to guess what it was actually. 'Yes.'

'What?'

She sighed. 'After... everything... I'm helping Yejun. He's still on the rocks. He's apathetic and blames everyone, especially you.' She sat on the coffee table, since it was only space rather clean. 'It's not a surprise.'

'If you came here to find me guilty, get in line. Everyone clearly wants to kill me, but still no one dares to. Please, do it.' Young Saeng spread his arms to the side, making a clear way to his chest.

'I came here to give you notice. The lease will end in the next month. Either you will prolong it by yourself or you'll have to move out.'

His hands hit the floor, lifelessly. 'I guess you find pleasure in slow tortures.'

'Yejun can't afford to keep it just for you, can't you see the obvious?' Jisoo wasn't sure what to think about Young Saeng. He was visibly heartbroken, but on the other hand she still didn't believe him at all. She wanted to stay on neutral ground.

'Where I will go?' He started to massage the space between eyebrows.

'Wherever you want. You're an adult, right?'

He clapped once. 'Fine. I died once, now it's second time. I hope third will be fatal.'

'It's like that, I can't help it.' She shrugged her shoulders and stood up to leave, but she paused before walking out. 'In the bag you have some food.' She pointed the bag on the table and shut the door, after going out.

Young Saeng rested his head on the wall behind him, closing his eyes. He started to bang his skull into it, firstly slowly, then harder as he finally felt the pain, he stopped and put his hand on the back of his head. He picked himself up and sat down at the table to eat. It was his first decent meal since the beginning of the mourning. This meal was almost as spiritual event, making new tear drops form in his eyes.

After he finished he wanted to drink something alcoholic, but he couldn't find anything not emptied in the rooms. He took the wallet to go and buy some more, but firstly he looked inside. He found out there was no money left. He took a deep breath and scratched his head. He'll look for some money later, now the full stomach was weighting him down making him drowsy, so he decided to go to bed. His sleeping schedule now was a mess, as well as his mental state.

He washed his face, the closest thing to being clean in the standards of the past weeks, and as he was walking to the couch, he stopped by Aeri's room. Though the time has passed he still didn't even open its door, so he laid down on the sofa and fell into hard sleep.

He had a nightmare, first one, he later remembered. In the dream he stood on the roof, not being in ability to move an inch, as that sick bastard was stabbing Aeri. Young Saeng screamed, but only gained the attention of that man, which started to laugh awfully.

But then the roof disappeared, leaving dreaming man with murderer in some kind of abyss. They stood in front of each other and stranger was cruelly smiling, as he knew something the second didn't. All at once some figures started to walk from behind of assailant profile.

First person Young Saeng recognized, it was general Shim Dae Song, but later only some women, unknown to the man. The silhouettes where blurred, their faces unclear. They quietly started to approach him, when he noticed he couldn't move an inch. He yelled as he woke up rapidly getting. His heart was about to burst, so he started to rub his face to get off this horrible picture. He was so tired of everything.

It was already dark outside. The sleep didn't energize him, rather drained the remains of energy he had.

Then, out of the blue, he heard Aeri's voice. Definitely her. 'Poor you, having such a nightmares...'

He jolted and glued himself to the back of the couch. He couldn't believe his ears. He looked around for the source of the noise. He looked at the window and saw some profile sitting on the floor. He clambered out of the blanket, tripping all over, until he reached the switch and turned the light on. Beside the window he saw clearly shocked crouching Aeri, as he looked directly at her.

She got up. 'Wait, you can see me?!'

He turned away, howled and grabbed his hair. 'Nooo, nooo!'

She started to approach him. 'Stop! Stop! It's me, it's really me!'

Young Saeng didn't listen, frozen in horror. He started to shout. 'Go away! Stop haunting me! I'm going mad...' He jumped out and started to look for full bottle or at least with something in it.

'Stop! Young Saeng! Jo Young Saeng! Immediately stop it. Please, I beg you, it's really me!'

He was in his world. He found not touched yet bottle and drunk everything in it. Then closed his eyes and put his hands to his ears. Blinded, he got to the couch, where he covered himself with blanket and he waited.

Few minutes later he stuck his head out and looked around. No one could be found. It was again deadly silent place. Only sound was his heavy breathing. He hugged the blanket and lifted himself up. He didn't switch the light off, as he thought the night is going to be harsh. He was sure he'll not fall asleep again.

'I'm so scared...' He whispered.

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