Spiderson Oneshots

Lokison Pt.2

Asgardian = Underlined

Peter's POV

"WHAT THE F***??" The Mom and Dad said

"Language! Peter, what the hell is happening?" Uncle Steve asks, confused

"We think that I'm Loki's biological son." I explain while Father nods by my side and Uncle Thor comes to my other side.

"WHAT." Dad says

"Let's just take a DNA test, everybody chill out." Mom suggests while everybody agrees.

Everybody heads down to Dad's lab and prepares for the DNA test. Dad takes a hair from my head and a hair from Fathers. He puts them in a machine and tells us it'll take about an hour for the results to come back.

There's a couple moments of silence and then Mom decides to spark up a conversation by asking "What language were you speaking and how did Petey-Pie know it?"

I smile at the nickname and she returns the smile while Father says "It was Asgardian. Only people of Asgardian blood can understand and speak it.", Mom nods thoughtfully and Auntie Tasha asks "How did you change bodies Peter?".

"Uhh. I guess I changed into the Frost Giant form when I was sleeping and then when I changed into human form, I thought of what I looked like and then changed." I answer

"And you other form?" Bucky asks

"I change him into that." Father says

Everyone nods and then Dad speaks up "Soooo, what do you call Loki Underoos?"

"I called him Father and he's fine with that. And I call you and Mom, Dad and Mom. Everyone else is Aunt or Uncle except for Wanda. This dysfunctional family just got a whole lot crazier." I say

"Yeah, yes it did." Uncle Sam says and everyone agrees.

There's a couple more moments of silence and then "Sooooo who's the mother Reindeer Games?" Dad asks suddenly.

Father looks taken back by the question and doesn't answer. When he doesn't answer Dad asks nervously, "You do know who the mother is. Right??"

"Of course I know who the mother is Stark!" Father snaps, Dad makes a gesture that says "Go on" so Father continues "Freyja, the goddess of love, beauty, war and gold. She is also my wife."

Everyone looks surprised that Father is married, "Your- your wife? YoU'rE MaRrIeD?" Uncle Clint asks

"Yeah, I am married. That's what 'my wife' means you moron." Father sasses while I burst out laughing. Even Dad can't hold in his laughter, he starts snickering too, much to Uncle Clint's dismay.

"How long have you guys been married for?" Wanda asks

"25 years in Asgardian but 16 years in Midgardian years." Father says

"So you guys has Peter when you were married for about a year?" Auntie Tasha says and Father nods his head yes.

"Did you guys give up Peter?" Uncle Bucky asks

"No. No we did not give up Pytor. When Thanos-" Father says

"Wait, wait. Hold up. Pytor?" Uncle Clint cutts off Father,

"Yes Pytor, it is basically Peter in Asgardian. Anyway, when Thanos took control of my mind, he took control of Freyja's too. I was ordered to attack Earth while Freyja was tasked with distracting Asgard. Freyja and I know the only way to keep Peter safe was to have a Midgardian to look after him, we knew his Aunt May and asked if she could look after him. She said yes and we planned to com back for him but then the consequences came. I was sentenced to 7 years in prison and 1 year on Asgard while Freyja was sentenced 3 years prison and 1 year on Asgard. When she got out of prison she wanted to go to Midgard to find Pytro but wasn't familiar with Earth and decided to wait for me. But then I was to stay with you guys. Whenever I was in my room, I was trying to find Pytor, my kid, with spells. Then this whole fiasco happened." Father explains.