JayDick Oneshots

💚 Fake It 'Til You Make It

Summary: Dick convinces Jay to fake-date him to get Babs off his back. It doesn't stay so fake. [3,194 words]

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Jason was just getting ready to go out on patrol when there was an urgent tapping on his bedroom window and he looked out to see Dick on his fire escape.

He opened his window and let him in. "What do you want?"

"Jason I need your help." Dick had never looked so serious and frantic, and Jason had to admit he was a little weirded out.

"What for?" He asked carefully.

Dick grimaced. "Babs asked me out and I freaked out and I accidentally blurted out that I was already dating someone and if she finds out I lied to her she'll kill me."

Jason raised his eyebrows. "And what do you want me to do about that, boy blunder?"

Dick closed his eyes and rushed out the words so quickly it took Jason a second to process them. "She asked who it was and for some reason you were the only name that popped into my head."

Jason blinked at him for a moment and then laughed. "No."

Dick peeked one eye open. "Please?"

"I'm not fake-dating you just because you lied to Barb, Dick. Be a big boy and own up to it." Pretending to date Dick was the last thing Jason needed. It would be too damn close to the real thing and it would feel cruel to not quite be able to have what he secretly wanted so bad. Dick was always already being dangled in front of him, a reminder of what he'd never be good enough to have.

Dick gave him some absolutely killer puppy eyes and grabbed one of his hands in both of his. "I'll owe you one, Jay — anything. Please. I'll pay for our dates and I'll make sure it doesn't take up too much time and I promise you'll have a good time; we just gotta do it for a couple weeks to make sure she's not suspicious and then we can break up."

Jason… Oh Jason fucking hated that he didn't know how to say no to Dick.

He let Dick wait for a few moments before he finally said, "Fine."

Dick gave him a dazzling smile and Jason felt his heart melt a little. Oh he was so fucked.

"Awesome!" And then Dick was fucking hugging him, because Dick was...Dick.

Jason let him and sighed heavily, trying to ignore how fucking good Dick smelled. (Was he wearing cologne? Why the hell would he be wearing cologne?) "So, what exactly am I gonna have to do for this whole charade?"

Dick pulled back, still smiling, and bounced slightly on his toes. "Oh it's gonna be easy peasy, we'll just have to go on a few dates and we should both stay at one or the other of our places most nights probably. But I'll work around your schedule and I can come over here if it's easier for you."

Oh yeah, Jason was fucked.

<<•>>

Dick caught up with him around three in the morning. "So are we going back to yours?"

Jason glanced at the CCTV camera pointed at them and nodded. "You're sleeping on the couch, loverboy," he said, taking full advantage of the fact that he could say whatever the fuck he wanted in his helmet without Barbara reading his lips.

Dick just smiled sunnily at him.

When they got back to Jason's place, Jason took his helmet and jacket off, taking his guns out of their holsters. "Don't touch anything," he said, grabbing some sleep clothes from his dresser and then heading to the shower.