THE GUARDIAN DEVIL

Chapter 18 "A dream I never want to wake up from!"

Angela's P.O.V

'Twenty four-twenty five-twenty six....' I counted the squares on the geometric patterned lampshade next to the couch I am sitting on, for the third time, sitting in the living room.

I try to distract myself by everything that comes to my mind, be it counting the random patterns or looking at the intricate details of the expensive decorative pieces gracing the room, but the restlessness and uneasiness in my heart is not lessening even a bit. My fingers unconsciously fiddle with the cushions on the couch during the whole time, but it still is not helping, not even a bit.

For the past three weeks that I have been here, I have got so used to of Lucifer being around me, that the mere thought of him leaving and me being alone is making me anxious.

When I saw him trying to avoid the meeting just to stay and take care of me, conflict stormed inside me. A part of me selfishly wanted him to stay by my side, but the better part of me asked him to go to his office as it was the right thing to do.

But then, why is doing the right thing making me feel nervous and gloomy. Why is the turmoil killing me?

"Lucifer" I called him as soon as I saw him entering the living room, all dressed up and ready to leave for his company.

"Yes angel..do you need anything?" he asked gently, taking quick steps towards me.

"Lucifer. c-can I come to your office with you?" I finally muster up the courage to ask him, getting relieved of the twitches of uneasiness in my stomach.

But surprisingly..not even a moment passed by and the nervousness that I was feeling earlier, grew a lot more. The anticipation to know his response made every passing second seem like an hour.

"What..why..I mean w-" he was clearly bewildered.

Perhaps he thinks, I will be a disturbance to his work. Probably, asking him was wrong on my behalf. He has already sidetracked his work these past few weeks, to take care of me. And now when he was finally going to start to focus on his work again, and got ready leave for his work, I am letting my selfishness getting in his way.

But somehow even though I knew that I was being selfish and it was wrong on my part, but still, a weird feeling filled my heart and it suddenly felt as if a heavy weight is burdening it. Lucifer didn't say anything for me to feel this way. He didn't even say a coherent sentence for that matter, but still, just the speculations my mind says are true about the reason Lucifer was perplexed, is making me feel extremely..disheartened.

"I am really sorry Lucifer. I should not have asked you, to take me to your office. I-it was very selfish of me." I said in a low voice, looking at the ground.

I was too ashamed to look into his eyes. How could I be so inconsiderate and mean to the person who is nothing but kind to me. I feel bad for Lucifer- for being a burden on him, while he treats me with so much care and tends to my every need.

In the past weeks, most of the times he knew what I wanted, when I am in pain, when I am not feeling well, and many other trivial things like these, even without me telling him.

The feeling of being taken care of, the feeling of being safe because your heart knows that someone is there by your side standing firm, the feelings that are not cultivated by mere words but are rooted deep in your heart because of the efforts reflected in someone's actions-the feelings that I forgot. Lucifer made me feel each of those sentiments!

But most importantly he treated me with respect. He not only respected my feelings and wishes but also respected my space that I needed after going through that hell. He respected my scars that are not only present on my body but also embedded in my soul. Respect- the word that was made foreign to me, was again familiarized to me by Lucifer!