THE GUARDIAN DEVIL

Chapter 50 "I Will Not Hold Back Anymore"

Lucifer's P.O.V

Adam Naese!

I don't know why but the name sounded oddly familiar. When my angel told me her brother's name, I unconsciously looked at Asher who too looked as dazed as me.

Something was not feeling right, as just hearing his name made me feel an uncanny nervousness in the pit of my stomach. No matter how hard I was trying to recall, I just couldn't put my finger on where I heard the name.

"If you want, I will look for him but until I find something, can you please stay out of trouble?" keeping my indescribable uneasiness at bay, I promised her.

Without uttering a single word, she just nodded in response, which in all honesty I was pretty much expecting after I blurted about how I felt about her, but that didn't lessen the pain that I felt at her silence, not even a bit.

"I'll go and rest for a while." she said to Asher and turned around to move out of the office, but halted abruptly and lowered her gaze as soon as her eyes fell on me.

It was clear that she was trying to avoid any eye contact with me which undoubtedly hurt, but I was also aware that she needed some time to wrap up her mind around the things that happened today.

So not wanting to make things more awkward for her than they already were, I just stepped aside without a single word.

"What was all that about?" Asher asked as soon as she went out of the office.

"Realization!" I answered truthfully.

"What?" he countered, obviously baffled.

"Today when the bullet hit my arm, I feared for the first time!" a chuckle escaped my lips as I looked at him.

"I feared losing my life, but not because I was afraid of death.. because I would never have been able to see my angel ever again. Because I would never have been able to tell me angel how I feel about her. Because I would never have been able to do all the things I wanted to do for my angel. And that's all because my angel doesn't even know how much how love her!" I paused.

"Today when I saw the truck approaching her to hit her..or even when I knew that she could get hurt amidst the shooting, I could not even protect her with all my might..because I was subconsciously hesitant about what would happen if my emotions.. my love for her would get the best of me."

"I was afraid of her reaction, and at last my fear led to getting her hurt." I subconsciously gritted my teeth and clenched my fingers into a fist at the thought.

"When I saw the blood that streamed out of her shoulder when the bullet grazed her, I wanted to hug her tightly, I wanted to comfort her but somewhere deep down I was hesitant to do so; just because I didn't want her to feel uneasy and perplexed about my actions."

"But you know what, ironically that fear made me realize that there is no such things as a 'right time' as they say. The moment you do what you want to do is the only right time."

"I wasted so many opportunities just waiting for that 'so-called right time', but could have been dead today, without my angel even knowing how much I love her, how much she means to me!" a subconscious chuckle escaped my lips.

"So I have decided that I will not hold back anymore. I have loved someone with all my heart for the first time in my life, and I will make sure that she knows it! I want to be selfish for the first time in my life Asher..Is it really so much to ask for!" I declared in a firm voice, but the turmoil flooding inside me still got the best of me in the end.

"But you saw how she reacted just now! Though I wish she behaved in such a manner just out of shock of your sudden revelation or the incident that took prior to that, but what if.." Asher voiced out my fear, though he too was hesitant to complete what was going to say.

"I know and in all honesty, I fear that too..but this fear will not be able to stop me from expressing my feelings for her.. not from now on!"

"It will always be her call to accept or reject my love.. she has every right to decide that.. but it will not make me stop loving her!" I stated with assertion and solemn.

"Fine! But when you formally propose to her, you will have to seek my permission too!" he said cockily, making me scoff at his wackiness. But I was really thankful for his attempt at lightening the mood.

"And why the hell would I do that?" I reverted, with the same playfulness.

"Because then, as her elder brother I can officially kick your ass if you ever trouble her. Though I will beat you to a pulp even if you don't seek my permission. But either way..you trouble her in any way..and you will have to face me!" he said with a smirk, making me chuckle.

"Deal!" I replied as I rolled my eyes.

"Ohh! That reminds me.. what about the promise you made to her?" He asked suddenly getting serious.

"Her brother!" he explained when unable to understand his sudden statement, I just stood blankly staring at him with bewilderment.

"You know that's a cakewalk for me! I'll ask for his details from her, the first thing tomorrow morning and as soon as I get them-" I said confidently but was cut off by him.

"Which is highly unlikely, judging by the way she was avoiding any kind of communication with you earlier!" he stated the fact, which really hurt but was the truth nonetheless.

"But she is still talking to you!" I suggested.

"Which is why, I will be the one who will search for him, and unless his files too are wiped off the slate just as hers, you know I will be needing not more than a few minutes." he said confidently.

"I know..but I don't know why the name Adam Naese is giving me an eerie feeling ever since that name fell off my angel's mouth." I told him what my intuition was pointing at, continuously.

"Likewise! The name is sounding really familiar but I just can't point my finger at where exactly I heard this name." he concurred.

"I just hope that this uneasy feeling is nothing but just our misapprehension." I wished sincerely.

But little did I know that this feeling was soon going to turn out to be the beginning of my worst nightmare.

A/N

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