empty crown // bakugou x reader

Chapter 35

Another night without sleep. Exhausted, she made her way to the healer's around noon due to her sore shoulder. He welcomed her with a wide smile and checked her wound.

"Didn't you take the pills?"

"I forgot I had them."

He chuckled and put his hand behind her head, stroking her hair for a bit before returning to disinfecting her shoulder. A tired smirk appeared on (y/n)'s face, feeling kind of embarrassed for being so absent minded.

"Your mental health isn't good, my dear. First thing you need to do is get some rest. Then you should work on your little triggers and you'll get better in no time."

"I don't think I'll get better anytime soon." she murmured.

He wrapped fresh bandages around her shoulder and gave her a painkiller after that.

"I know it's hard for you, but you have to accept the fact that he is gone. Believe me, it pains me to tell you this but it's the truth unfortunately." he softly spoke, squatting down so that he met her eyes that were glued to the floor.

"I understand." she whispered, getting up from the wooden stool.

Aizawa was waiting for her outside the healer's room. He wanted to help her get better no matter what, even if it meant that he had to take short trips to the castle and then back home daily.

"I own this huge castle and you still won't ask me to stay in one of the guest rooms." she softly smiled.

"I didn't think of that, to be honest, but I must admit that it would be very convenient for me."

"Feel free to pick whichever one you prefer."

Aizawa followed after her, his mind drifting to the said guest rooms. The one with the big windows would be nice, he thought. His eyes then fell on her cloak. It wasn't one of the expensive or elegant cloaks she would often wear. Instead, it was the one she was given yesterday.

"You did a good job stitching the ends." he said, slightly lifting the cloak with his hand and taking a good look at the stitched places.

"You think so?" she asked, her voice faintly brightening at the sudden praise.

"I do."

"Your majesty, you have a letter."

Aizawa took the small envelope in his hands and followed (y/n) to her beautiful garden. While she watered her flowers, he read the letter out loud and it turned out that it was from one of the villagers that she had helped return home the other day.

"You reunited many families huh." he said, putting the letter back in its white envelope.

"I'm glad they are happy."

...

(y/n) got a dinner invitation from Todoroki. And of course, she headed to his castle not long after. Her days never failed to be torturous in their own ways. She didn't want to visit Todoroki. She wanted to stay in the comfort of her own castle. Even though it was far from comforting now.

Momo took (y/n)'s hand and lead her to the usual dinning hall where Todoroki waited for them with a heartwarming smile.

Why did it feel so wrong? Why did it feel wrong for her whenever she tried to enjoy their company? Maybe it was because her friends back at the village were still grieving.

"How are you feeling today (y/n)?"

"No triggers today." she faked a smile.

"That's good." said Momo while filling (y/n) a glass of wine.

"Ah, I'm not really in the mood for wine." (y/n) murmured, nervously taking a small fork in her hand.

"How about some juice? Tea?"

"Some tea would be nice."

After some minutes a servant entered the hall with a pot full of warm tea, filling (y/n)'s cup before leaving again.

"You're not in the mood for food either?" asked Todoroki, a saddened smile forming on his lips.

"I'm sorry." (y/n) whispered while getting a hold of the warm teacup.

"You don't need to apologize (y/n). But if you don't mind me asking, when was the last time you had a proper meal?"

"I.. I don't really remember."

"How about you stay here for some days? Maybe some company would be good for you." smiled Todoroki, Momo nodding her head in agreement.

"It's okay. I actually feel bad that you're trying to help me out. Aizawa is having a hard time with me too. It's like you're looking after a child."

"We're only doing it because we care about you. You don't have to feel guilty about it!"

"Yeah.. I guess you're right."

...

After some hours, (y/n) finally returned to her own castle. She soaked herself in the bathtub and brought her knees closer to her chest.

He was the only thing she had in mind. He was the only one who listened to her talk about flowers and plants. He was the only one who understood her thoughts and wishes. The only one who made her feel safe, loved, cherished.

Words couldn't even explain how much she wanted to know what she meant to him. He wasn't the person to really talk about his feelings, and she understood that completely. She already knew that he loved her more than life itself.

Had she made that clear to him? Or did he think that she didn't love him enough. She would do anything for him. Did he know that?

There was a day where they had gone back to that forest but rain made them return to the castle earlier than they had planned. Soaked, they snuck into her chamber after she had dismissed the guards hours prior. They were so cold. They were trembling while laughing at how funny they looked. Then, they took a hot bath together and slept in eachother's arms for the rest of the night.

She smiled to herself after thinking that. How could she possibly forget their memories? Or rather, how could she not feel heartbroken whenever she thought about them?

Only thing she knew was that she had to move on sooner or later. Not for her sake, but for his.

Because we dream as we live. Alone.