New Beginnings [Gerard Way x Female reader]

Chapter 23: I believe you

We'd been getting our relationship back on track and Gerard was finally spending time with me and s/n. I know he wanted my true forgiveness but it's hard I've told him I forgive him many times but we both know that I can't help but see him differently now. We sat on the sofa as it rained outside I leaned on Gerard and he had his arm around me holding me close, S/n was asleep so it was just the two of us. "Sugar, I do know you haven't truly forgiven me" Gee sighed

"How can I?" I shrugged "You went behind my back, you cheated on me and I do get that your intentions weren't bad and you were desperate for work but it hurts... it's hurts me a lot, Gerard" I said sadly

"Words can't describe how sorry I am and you know that"

"I know and I really am trying hard but I don't know if I'll ever be able to see you in the same way again"

"I know..." he said bringing me closer

"I only ever wanted to make you happy, Gerard" I said looking up at him and into his eyes

"I know, do you think I don't know that? And you do make me happy, you make me a very happy man" I did like to hear that so I cuddled up to him tighter "I know this a bit cheeky of me to ask, but may I have a kiss?" How could I refuse him he may've done bad things and yes he has hurt me. A lot. But to me he was still so amazing and beautiful so I pecked him on the cheek. "Thank you, Beautiful" him calling me that just made me feel good.

"I love you" I whispered to him and he heard it I half wanted him to hear me and I half didn't.

"I love you too" he said kissing the top of my head

"We can get through this, right?" I said unsure if we actually could.

"Of course, baby"

"I know it's been hard for both of us and I know you've done some stupid things and so have I, I guess, but I am proud of you, Gerard"

"Why?"

"You ain't touched a drink in a little while now" I said before pecking him on the lips

"You know it might not seem like it to you because of my past actions but I really do love you, y/n, and I love that you still care"

"I always care, Gerard, how could I not? Although it is hard for me to forget what you did, I could never stop caring about you, you're so amazing and special" I told him wrapping my arms around him.

"You're sweet" he chuckled "you're the greatest thing to ever happen to me"

"You reckon?" I asked

"Yeah definitely and I was stupid to almost let you go... oh and sugar I've got a gig with the band later you can come and watch if you like?"

"I'd love to Gerard but I've got to take care of S/n" I sighed

"Oh... yeah sorry"

"It's okay, Gee, I hope you have fun"

"Also I've heard there's some labels who are looking to sign us"

"Oh that would be amazing" I beamed at him

"Yeah hopefully it'll all be okay in the end"

"You're so talented, Gee, I'm sure you'll do well" I smiled

"I'm such a lucky man to have you
y/n and I promise that one day I'll be able to give you the life you deserve"

"I'm happy as long as you're happy, Gerard"

~~~
Gerard was about to leave for his gig. "I know you're gonna smash it, Gerard" I said putting my arms around his waist and hugging him "I'm sorry I can't come and see you"

"Thank you, Sugar, and it's okay I'm sure they'll be plenty of opportunities for you to see us" he kissed my lips lovingly. "I should get going I'll come home straight after"

"Okay"

"Goodbye, Sweetheart"

"Bye, Gerard"

"Bye, S/n" Gee said before blowing a kiss to him and left.

And then it was silent again. I hated the fact of barely seeing Gerard but I wanted him to chase his dreams so it's not like I'm gonna stop him.

I was tired so I just fed S/n and went to bed unfortunately for me S/n didn't have the same idea as me so he was crying for hours so I had to sit up and try and calm him down but it was very difficult. He wouldn't stop crying and I started to cry because there was nothing I could do to stop it, it had literally been hours probably about four when Gerard finally came home.

"Sugar what are you doing still up?" He asked as he saw me sitting on the sofa still crying then he saw S/n, "is everything okay?"

"He won't stop crying, Gee, he won't stop and I'm tired I wanna go to bed but I can't" I sobbed

"Aww" he gave me a hug then he sat down and held S/n for a bit

"How was it?"

"It went really well, got paid $50"

"Oh I'm so proud of you, Gerard" I said before kissing his sweaty cheek

Weirdly enough S/n had actually stopped crying since Gee was holding him. I kind of felt bad but I was too tired to be too annoyed I was just glad he finally shut up. "Aww thank you come on let's go to bed it's late" I nodded to him and went with him to bed.

We cuddled and he told me he was sorry once again and I know he means it when he says it otherwise he wouldn't've stuck around. He was so loving I wouldn't want him any other way. I was resting on his chest in the morning "y/n? Are awake?"

"I am"

"Me and the guys are thinking of touring because we have a quite a lot of fans now"

"Touring!? Gerard, I love you a lot and I want nothing more than for you to chase your dreams but what about me? What about S/n?"

"I know... but if it goes well I can take care of you both way better and I'll ring you every night. Promise."

"Promise?"

"I promise, y/n"

"How long will you be gone for?"

"Hmm about four months"

"If this is truly what you wanna do, Gee, then I want you to go and do it and I know it's gonna be long, but you promise to come back to me when it's over?"

"I promise" he said kissing my cheek

"I trust you, Gerard, I trust you a lot...god knows why...but I do"

"And I trust you, y/n, I won't be gone too long but we'll be leaving next week"

That actually hurt me. I wasn't gonna see him for four months. "Gee? If you ever go on a UK tour please take me with you?"

"Of course I will I always have told you that when I can afford it I'll take you there again" he said playing with my hair

"Thank you" I said sitting up and kissing his lips. "I hope you have fun" I smiled.

"I hope so too"

All I could really think of though was four months in this flat alone with my son and no Gerard to protect me or to help. But I trusted him to keep his word and to return after four months. All the other people in this area who actually care about me are in the band and my mate Marie left a few months ago.

"I will ring you every night." He said

"I believe you"