My Neighbor's Friend

The Heart Wants What The Heart Wants

~Mikasa Ackerman~

"What's that brat doing here?!" is what leaves Uncle Kenny's mouth as soon as we're out of earshot.

I sigh. This is gonna be difficult.

As we take the turn that leads to our house, my mind travels back to Eren. I wince internally remembering how lifeless he seemed. Guilt and helplessness eats me out from within. Eren was there for me when I lost my parents. He's the one I've always looked up to. I thought I was ready to do anything for him, as long as it made him happy. I wanted to be able to return even just a little bit of everything he's done for me.

But now, I don't think I've ever felt so powerless before. I always thought Armin and I were enough for Eren. That we can be there for him in any situation, that we can protect him. From the world, from others, even from himself.

I've never been more wrong.

Because this time, we have failed. We've been doing everything we can think of and yet, he wouldn't open up to us. Closing himself off like that and suffering in silence – while all we could do was watch.

And then, Levi Ackerman came out of the blue and immediately, Eren sought comfort in him.

It will be a lie if I say I wasn't jealous. I was angry, furious even. How dare he leave Eren heartbroken like that and then waltz back into his life like it's nothing? Especially when my friend is at his most vulnerable. I would've stepped in and told him to leave, to never show himself in front of us again. But Armin held me back. And then he pointed it out. Something I probably would've overlooked intentionally had he not showed it to me.

Levi Ackerman was holding Eren like he's the most precious thing in the world. And Eren was finally looking alive.

That's when I knew.

We're not enough for Eren anymore. Not this time. The shorty is the one he needs. It has to be him.

I thought I was ready to do anything to make Eren happy. But watching silently as someone else came out of nowhere and claimed the most special place in his heart proved to be a much harder task than I'd previously assumed. After all, Armin and I have always been the ones Eren prioritizes the most. It's not easy to accept it when someone else takes that away all of a sudden.

Sometimes I envy Armin. He can always think rationally and choose the best course of action. People would say I'm the same, that I'm unemotional and ruthless. I do what's necessary, not caring about anyone or anything. Yes, it's true. I am like that. But not when those two are concerned. To me, Eren and Armin come before all of that. When it's about them, all sense of rationality leaves me.

So it's no wonder that I'm in a dilemma right now. On one hand, I want Eren to be happy and for that he needs Levi. That much I'm sure of. But on the other hand, that shorty is getting more priority than Armin and I. And no matter how selfless you think I am, I can't just accept it with a smile!

Well, anyway. It's not like I have a choice. Eren's emotion is what's most important right now. So, it's pretty much clear what I have to do.

Come to think of it, I need to get back to them soon. And for that, I gotta make Uncle Kenny understand the whole picture.

"He's Hange's friend", I speak once we get inside the house.

"Hange...? Hange Zoe? That eccentric neighbor of the Jaegers?" Uncle Kenny doesn't seem impressed.