Knock, Knock

Sixty

Casey

It was dark in my room, but I could still make out the silhouette of my girlfriend making her way back to me. I try to act sleep, but I find myself rolling over and facing her. "Important phone call?" I question. The woman doesn't budge, she keeps her back to me as she sets her phone face down on the nightstand. Something she never did.

"I guess you can say that. Why are you up? You have the senior trip tomorrow. You guys are leaving before 10. Shouldn't you be getting some rest."

I didn't need to see her face to know that it didn't match the tone of her voice. She was masking a lot from me, a lot that I could possibly help her with. I sigh and sit up, placing my hand on her shoulder. "Tell me what happened."

The woman only lets out a breath as she shakes her head, trying to ignore this event. But I can't let it slide. Not this time. She's been acting weird since the pep rally. Being jumpy, secretive, and most of all distant. I couldn't wait any longer. "Kathryn," I groan scooting closer to her.

She shrugs my hand away from her and stands from the edge of the bed. My eyes follow her to the living room. I roll my eyes and follow behind her. In here our facial expressions were no longer shadowed by the dark. In here, I could see and feel her fear and sadness. "Tell me" I hiss softly, sure not to scare her.

Her once warm soft eyes land on me, broken, tired, boring. It broke me. Seeing her like this hurts me so much. "Who did you call? Who have you been sneaking around with? Are you cheating on me?"

Hurt was seen all in her eyes before she masked it. "Why would I cheat on you Casey? You know I love you."

I shrug my shoulders, "It's the only thing that makes sense! I thought maybe Rai was back but you would've told me. Just tell me what's going on with you! You're so jumpy and scared. What happened Kathryn?"

Kathryn averts her gaze and anger takes over. I grab her shoulders roughly, "What aren't you telling me?"

"Casey, you're hurting me." I quickly let her go and take my anger out on the pillows of my couch. I throw one across the room and glance at the brunette. "A healthy relationship is built on trust and communication. Kathryn, I'm trying, do you not trust me? Why are you shutting me out?"

Tears welled in my eyes as I glare at the woman. "A relationship consists of two people and lately it feels like it's just me here. Why are you dating me if you're tired of me? What did I do to you? Do you hate me so much you rather just sting me along making me think you still love me?"

By this time tears are streaming down my cheeks and I'm fighting myself from looking away from the beauty. She just looks away. "And now you're playing victim! I can't continue feeling sorry for you when you're sabotaging your own relationship. I knew 3 months was too fast. You're already out of it."

I continue to let my anger out but she doesn't say anything. "Kathryn, I'm breaking up with you! Do you not care at all? Will you seriously not fight for me? For us?"

And once again, she doesn't say anything. Making my way to my door, I open it. "Get out Kathryn. Just go home" I hiss keeping my eyes on the floor. She does as I ask her, breaking my heart with every step she takes. Does she really not care?

- - - - -

The events of last night felt like a dream, but my heart knew it wasn't. Even though it happened over 12 hours ago, my heart was still breaking. I spent the whole night staying awake, wondering if maybe I was overreacting. I felt like I was being immature with my actions. I shake my head and join my friends in front of the school.

"Whoa Casey... you look like shit" Duke jokes throwing an arm over my shoulder. I let out a sarcastic laugh and nod my head, not really in a joking mood. I wasn't going to get over this, was I?