love me like you mean it // chaelisa

thirty-eight

"It's nice." Jennie said after taking a sip of her coffee.

"What is?" Chaeyoung asked more than slightly confused.

Jennie laughed with the shake of her head. "You and Lis being friends."

Chaeyoung's eyes widened a little. "It's not like that, I mean we are friends but that's it."

"Friends who occasionally sleep together."

Chaeyoung sighed. "Once in awhile but it's not, we're not, she's not..."

"I'm sure you're both not, but what if you are?"

"I'm not sure I want to think about it any differently. I don't know what I'm ready to put my heart back out there. Jennie she crushed me, and we both know that is not something I have ever let people do. It took me a long time to be okay, and now that I am I don't know if I want to risk it."

Jennie smiled. "Here's a little secret for you. She's never been okay, not since the day it happened, that is until now. Chaeyoungster I haven't seen her this at peace in a long time."

Chaeyoung smiled. "New York can do that to you. As fast paced as it is, it's an amazing city for helping someone find themselves."

"Keep telling yourself that, maybe one day we'll both believe it. Better yet maybe one day, you'll tell me that I was right."

"You're loving this a little too much." Chaeyoung informed her friend as she pushed her sunglasses back down from atop her head.

XOXO

"So you and Chaeyoung?" Chithip smiled at her daughter from across the table in the restaurant.

"There is no me and Chaeyoung mom."

Her mother nodded. "Not yet, but there will be and when there is, if you break her heart again Lisa, I will not be happy."

Lisa smiled with the shake of her head. "I swear she is more your daughter sometimes than I am. What if I don't end up with Chaeyoung, what if I end up with someone else entirely."

"Then your father and I will support your decision."

Lisa raised an eyebrow. "But you'll support it more if it's Chaeyoung."

Her mother nodded. "She makes you happy Lisa, in a way no one else ever has, as a parent that makes me happier than anything else."

"Is that why you were always indifferent with Niki?"

"I wasn't indifferent."

Lisa gave her mother a look. "I tried sweetie, I really tried but I knew how upset Chaeyoung was and then I saw her start to move on and I missed her. Her and I stopped talking as much, she distanced herself from us because we reminded her of you. Niki is truly lovely but she never brought the pure joy out of you. Your eyes never lit up when she walked into the room. I'm not saying you didn't love her Lili, I'm saying she wasn't the one."

"And you think Chaeyoung is?"

"I think we both know Chaeyoung is." Without meaning to her lips turned up into a smile and she knew she couldn't deny it.

"It might be too late for us but I'm going to try my hardest to prove to her that I'm not the girl I was then. I've grown up, she's grown up, our lives are different now but when we're together the feeling is the same." A pause. "No, it's better, it's so much better mom. I appreciate how hard she's worked to get where she is. I'm proud of her for following her dreams and now deep down all I feel is joy, not some hidden place of resentment that she left."

Her mother smiled at her and put a hand a top hers. "I hate to be the one to tell you this but this world has always known that. I'm just glad that you're finally figuring it."