My Rival Enchantress

BABE?

It's already 7 pm in the evening, naiwan ako dito mag-isa kasi napagod talaga ako. Limang araw na ang nakakalipas simula noong practice namin. Ang bilis ng araw! While Amanda went out kasi nasa ground floor daw yung team niya, may konting meeting daw, mabilis lang sila sabi niya.

Whoa, ang ganda talaga ng view dito sa room namin, the glass is huge, mala-office nga ang dating.

Tanging ang malaking kurtina lang ang nagsisilbing panakip.

The city lights, billboards, cars and specially the stars that I am looking right now is breathtaking.

Nakakahumaling tumingin sa taas, kung saan nagsisilabasan ang mga bituin at ang buwan.

THE UNIVERSE.

This is really relaxing, sobrang nakakatulala, naalala ko na ngayon lang ulit ako na-relaxed, simula noong  nanalo ako sa MUP, nawalan na ako ng oras na magsight-seeing because of trainings and guestings.

There's so many questions that enters my mind right now, in this very moment.

My family, kumusta na kaya sila?! Are they really fine? Proud kaya sila sa akin? Si mama at ang bunso kong kapatid, sana di sila nastre-stress, tinawagan ko naman sila kanina. They were fine naman daw pero sana nga totoo.

Nag-aalala ako for them.

My dad, is he still alive? Namimiss ko na siya ng sobra.

Makikita ko pa kaya siya? Sana naman magparamdam siya kahit saglit. Wala pa rin akong clue kung nasaan siya, ang hirap hanapin ng nagtatago. Sana naman nagkakamali ako na nagtatago siya, nakalimutan na ba niya talaga kami?

My Miss Universe Philippines team, are they satisfied with my performance? I know I gave my very best when it comes to practices and some shoots, dala-dala ko ang tinuro nila sa akin and ganon din ang self-confidence na binuo ko ng walong buwan.

Napaaga na nga yung shoot with Miss Olivia dahil kailangan na raw namin mag-focus next week. Nakabuti na rin naman yun.

And my last question is

IS THE PHILIPPINES PROUD OF ME? THEY WILL STILL SUPPORT ME?

This is the real goal kaya ako sumali dito

Para sa bayan.

Paano kung matalo ako? I know they are rooting for me dahil gusto na ulit nilang manalo ako.

Kahit ako naman e. I wanted to win, what if hindi ako yung tinadhana sa korona?!

Natatakot ako not because of the judgement of other people but to see on their faces the disappointment.

NOT NOW RABIYA! WAG MONG PAIRALIN ANG NEGATIVITIES, MANANALO KA.

I sighed heavily and release all the negativities that comes to my mind.

Comfort.

Alertness.

Love.

Pride.

Patience.

I need to maintain those five, to be more motivated and powerful for the upcoming activities.

I know I can do it!

Two more days and start na ng close-door interview and preliminaries.

And the most awaited, coronation night.

I stared at the stars, pakiramdam ko naka-align sa akin ang lahat.

I just feel something different while looking at the stars, as if they were talking to me.