Basically, I Hate You

SIXTEEN

"Luna. Luna! Luna, you have to wake up." A soft feminine voice called from just beyond my unconscious state.

I felt my body being shaken lightly and I blinked my eyes open slowly. As I took in my environment it all came crashing back and I tensed up tightly, any solace I had found in sleep now shattered as I prepared myself for the horrible news I was surely about to receive. I peered at Dr. Carson through bleary eyes and waited for her to say what I most dreaded. Rhett is dead. Although I was sitting right beside his bed I refused to look over at his body, petrified of what I might see.

Maybe he'd look like the people who bled from their eyes and ears in that movie we'd watched about a zombie virus. Or maybe he'd be completely blue from asphyxiation. Or perhaps the most gutting visual of all was that he'd look like himself except devoid of all life. Still, cold and dead. Never to talk to me again, or to laugh, ceasing to exist in my world.

"I'm sorry to wake you but it's been about eight hours. It's dinner time at the packhouse. You should go and have something to eat." Dr. Carson said, interrupting my morbid thoughts. I looked at her as her words sank in. Letting out a deep breath I looked over at Rhett who still looked the same. His chest rose and fell slowly as if he was sleeping.

Oh, thank sweet baby Jesus.

I smiled at Dr. Carson. "I'm okay. How is he?"

"He's completely stable. He'll be fine even if you go and eat. I can handle watching over him. It is my job after all." She said, smiling sweetly.

I looked from her to Rhett and back to her once more.

"No, I- I can't leave him. I already did once and look where that got us."

She sighed lightly and offered another tight smile before she nodded and walked away.

How could I walk away again? If I'd never walked away the first time he would've never come looking for me and he'd be healthy and happy like he always was.

This is all my fault. God, I'm so fucking sorry Rhett.

I felt the tears I'd unwittingly begun to cry hit the palms of my hands as they rested in my lap before I quickly swiped them away. I couldn't leave him now, not even to eat. I didn't care about anything else. Not until Rhett was okay. I stared at his monitors for a long time before I noticed the door opening behind me. I ignored it and continued staring at the lines appearing on the heart monitor, assuring me that his heart was still beating. Everything else was of no concern to me. Whoever had entered approached me, stopping just behind me.

"Hey, girl." Anya spoke quietly. Her face twisted into a sad smile as she looked over Rhett.

I looked away from her quickly, irrationally fearing that in the seconds I hadn't been staring at the monitors willing his heart to beat that it had stopped. But, it hadn't.

That's it, Rhett. Fight.

I heard Anya shuffling beside me as she pulled up a folded chair.

"I heard about what happened to your friend. How is he?" She asked tentatively.

"Alive. That's all that matters."

"What's his name?" She asked.

"Rhett. His name is Rhett Everhart." She grabbed my hand and squeezed lightly in response to the pain evident in my voice. When I looked up she was smiling reassuringly.

"Rhett Everhart. That's a nice name. Very sweet sounding."

I smiled at her compliment.

He is. He's the best.