BLUE [BUCKY BARNES]

HE'S BACK

It had been nearly a month since the battle of Wakanda. A month since half of the world was snapped away. Nearly a month since Elizabeth last saw Bucky and everyone she loved. A month since they had all died.

The word itself was hard for her to say. When someone died you managed to keep a piece of them, you managed to bury them, to have closure. You were able to say goodbye, as if they were going on vacation and you'd see them soon. But instead of that it had all happened so fast, with just a snap of his fingers, they were all gone.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Elizabeth lifted her head up and looked around Sam's room. She brought her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on them as she sniffled softly. She didn't dare touch anything in the room, afraid that he would one day come back to find all his stuff in the wrong place. She knew he hated that.

Lifting the sleeves of the large sweater up, she wiped at her moist eyes. As she brought her hand back down to rest in her lap, she saw there was a damp patch on the dark red fabric. Elizabeth frowned at the sight, not wanting to cover Bucky's sweater in her tears. She didn't want to risk it losing his scent.

She didn't realize Steve had entered the room until he knocked on the open door frame. He was dressed in a plain white t-shirt with faded blue jeans. He looked at her with a pitiful gaze as he crossed his arms in front of his chest. He had shaved, she thought to herself as she squinted at his face in the moonlight coming through from the large windows.

"Hey," Elizabeth says with a forced smile. "What's up? Are you okay?" She asks Steve who leaned against the doorframe. The man taking a look around the room with a nostalgic look, a soft sigh coming from him.

He shook his head at her with his hands stuffed into his pockets. "I just caught you crying alone in the dark and you're asking me if I'm okay?" Steve smiled up at her sadly as she wiped her tear stained hands on the duvet.

"I just meant to ask if you needed help with something," She cleared her throat to get rid of the scratch in her voice. "Or if there's anything I could do," she added as she played with the fingers in her lap.

He sighed and made a move to sit beside her at the edge of the bed. "Lizzie, we lost." Steve stated. It felt painful to say it out loud. They had lost. They lost the fight, they lost friends, they lost family, they lost everything. "There's nothing to be done now."

"I could get rid of it," she whispered, making Steve confused at her words. "I could get rid of that horrible feeling I know you have inside. I can do it." Elizabeth nodded her head when she recognized what Steve felt deep inside him.

"The emptiness and pain," She stated heavily as she felt her eyes begin to water once again. "The grief and sadness that keeps coming up again and again, no matter how many times you try to knock it down."

Steve closed his eyes at her words and squeezed them tightly until he saw shapes and faces that he knew weren't real anymore. The faces behind the sadness that he felt. He knew what she was offering but she couldn't accept. "Lizzie-" he tried to stop her but she started up again.

"You know, I tried." Elizabeth's voice cracked at the end, making her wince. "I tried so hard to try and change how I feel, like I do for others." Steve listened by her side with a down turned gaze, hearing the strain in her voice.

She brought her eyes up and stared at the closed bedroom door. She remembered all the nights she stayed up late, desperate to change how she felt inside. The days after her parents died and her brothers left were the most draining. But none of them compared to when Bucky went back on ice. Wanting to feel something other than the emptiness in her heart. Then she lost him for real, she lost everyone. And that felt like a bullet to the brain.