MANCHILD
'noun'
"A boy or adolescent from the streets who was prematurely exposed to and knowledgeable about sex, violence and crime, incarceration, adult responsibility for younger siblings due to a dysfunctional home, and hustling to make a living...
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"That dent-faced bastard. How the fuck is he just gonna ghost you like this? And then Ben's ass is just enabling him...all those stupid ass niggas enable each other." Rico huffed as she flopped down on my bed next me as I laid up, staring outside. I felt eyes on me, but I continued to look off into space, trying my hardest to dissolve into nothing.
It's been thirty days; thirty fucking days since I last saw Kentrell. I blew up his phone and texted him but didn't receive a reply. I tried talking with his friends, but apparently no one knew where he was. Nisha hadn't seen him. Tee Lee hadn't seen him. Nobody offered up any information of his whereabouts and that pissed me off.
After a week of his no-call no-show ways, I stopped calling and texting; I stopped looking. All I did was sit in my room and eat chocolate all day. Mama kept her distance, probably sensing that something was bothering me and that I wanted to be left alone. It was weird because there were moments where she'd peek in my room to check on me and she'd have this sad look on her face. She'd open her mouth to speak, but no words came out.
The only time we actually spent together was when she took me to where my group therapy sessions were and pulled me out of the meetings. She told me that she knew a psychiatrist that could probably help me and that she set me up for my first session. I agreed to it, opting to not say anything because I high-key didn't care about that shit. All I cared about was what Kentrell and I were going to discuss once he finally decided to resurface and face me.
"Bubbles..." I heard Rico say, trying to get my attention. I didn't turn or look at her, but I felt the need to acknowledge her. She was the only person that I truly wanted around because she wasn't getting on my nerves.
"What?" I asked. I knew that I sounded cold, but I couldn't help it. I was confused, angry, and heartbroken.
"You can't sit in this room all day, every day."
"I didn't sit in the room all day." I told her flatly. It wasn't a lie. I had my first one-on-one with the new psychiatrist lady. It didn't go the way she probably hoped. The entire one-hour session was spent in total silence on my end. She tried to encourage me to speak, but my mind was completely gone. I had zero interest in talking to anybody other than Kentrell Desean Gaulden.
