𝐑𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐬 // 𝐑𝐞𝐠𝐮𝐥𝐮𝐬 𝐁𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤 [𝟏]

Chapter 51

"It was love,
and I lived in it.

And
it is grief,
and I will carry it."

Two months came and went. Kira had not left Rose Manor for anything other than Death Eater meetings and to get food.

Her meetings consisted of updates on the war and reports of the missions a few members partook in. They let her go on one mission where she was able to silence all of their movement so they could infiltrate the ministry. They gathered names and addresses of muggleborn children and their parents. A day later some of those people died.

She grieved for the dead each day. The people she helped to kill. Her mind could not afford for her to dwell on it too long.

Some days her body moved like a machine. She went to meetings, trained, and then came home to eat and sleep. Her mind was not really there.

Other days, she felt everything at once. She got home and cried for hours, sometimes forgetting to eat or only going to sleep in the early hours of the morning.

On the days she felt okay, she managed to make herself feel worse. How could she feel okay when she was helping people Murder innocent muggles and muggleborns. She was contributing to a war and the guilt of being able to sleep or go on as if nothing happened killed her.

She went to her owl that sat in the living room on a stand. He had a letter in his mouth and Kira assumed it was another call for a meeting but when she saw the handwriting she knew it was not.

It was from James Potter. His handwriting was barely readable but anyone who knew him could tell it was his.

Dear Kira,

We have not heard from you in a while, I hope you're well. We all miss you.
We would like you to come see little Harry Potter. He's three days and 7 hours as of writing this letter. Yes I have been counting. Who knew I would be a dad?

Hope to see you soon,
Your Favourite Cousin.

She smiled for the first time in ages. Harry Potter had been born. Her life had focused on being a Death Eater and her grief, she had completely forgotten about her friends and family.

She was being horrible. How could she be so focused on herself that she forgot her family? Had she been so selfish?

After getting changed, Kira apparated to the Potter's house in Godric Hollow. James opened the door and greeted her with a hug.

"Kira! It's so good to see you!" He said, pulling her into a big hug.

"It's good to see you too, James," she laughed.

James moved out of the way to let her enter and Lily ran up to her and threw her arms around her. "Kira! We've missed you!"

Kira laughed, surprised at the genuineness in it. "Lily! How are you?"

"I'm as good as one can after giving birth."

"I can imagine," she chuckled.

She moved out of the way and her eyes found Remus who gave her a warm hug. She had always enjoyed his hugs.

Remus said his hello's and Kira saw Sirius at the back with a baby in his arms. She froze. Sirius noticed it. He looked so much like Regulus and her heart ached at the thought.

She caught herself and walked up to him. "And who's this?" She asked with a smile. She pushed down the memories of Regulus and focused on what was in front of her. Her cousin's baby.

"What am I? Chopped liver?" Sirius scoffed, but he made no movements. He was gentle with the baby in his arms. Kira found it amusing to see him so soft around Harry.

"Little Harry," she whispered, holding out her hand. Harry reached up his hands and grabbed her finger. She laughed. He was adorable.

"You can hold him," Lily said from behind her.

Kira stared at her. "Really?"

Lily nodded, a grin on her face. "Go ahead."

Sirius handed her Harry, his movements slow and careful. She looked down at him and rocked him slightly in her arms. She made a promise to herself that day to not fall deeper into the hole she found herself in. Regulus would not want her throw away her life. She would try her hardest to get back on her feet. She became a Death Eater to save her family and friends, there was no point in forgetting they exist.

After chatting for a bit, Lily went to go get snacks ready while Remus and James began talking about Quidditch, to Remus' displeasure.

Sirius caught her eye and nodded his head towards a hallway. She followed him as they took a walk through the house.

"How are you doing?" He asked after a moment. They stopped and he leant against the wall with his hands in his pockets.

Kira sighed and crossing her arms she leant against the wall opposite to him. She would not cry today. "I would say I'm doing fine but you wouldn't believe me."

He nodded. "Promise me you'll get through this." He held out his hand to her and she grabbed it. He squeezed it. "I'm here for you. Promise me you won't let this destroy you."

She looked at him. "I promise." And she meant it. Regulus had admired her strength and so she would be strong. For him. For Sirius. For her friends and her family.

Sirius nodded and tugged her closer, pulling her into her hug. They stood there for a while, embracing the comfort the other offered.

Kira had been so busy with herself she had forgotten Sirius was also in mourning. He had lost a brother. She knew how much it hurt. Evan was also mourning the loss of his best friend. She needed to check up on him.

She was not alone. She never would be. They needed to help each other through this loss.

She would find a way to cope with the loss and then she would try to destroy the Death Eaters from within.

This would not be her end.

________________________________________

The end.

Kidding :)

Hope you enjoyed!

Btw I was gonna write another chapter but I didn't feel like it and I didn't want to spend two months procrastinating it so I skipped it. It's not really important and doesn't add anything to the story but yeah

– walkingmasterpiece xx