S e c r e t

Chapter 17- Torn.

I can't remain in the air much longer, my strength is dwindling and my wounds are bleeding through again. I needed to get to somewhere safe, but I can't leave Liyue. I won't make it if I go somewhere else.

The rain was pelting down on my back, stinging my face as I fluttered down to the path below me. I landed with a light thud. I looked up at the building that stood tall in front of me. The Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. I tucked my wind glider under the bulletin board outside the main door. I staggered over to the parlors doors and have a light knock. My knuckles ached in pain, still bruised from battle.
At this point, my hair was soaked. I was shivering from the cold. I only had a light shirt on, and it was drenched. I wish I would have taken Childe's jacket with me. I just want to run into his arms and have him explain this all to me, but no.

He betrayed me. He lied to me.
But I love him.
Did he really love me too?

"Y/N? What are you doing here? You should be in the hospital." You heard a low voice ask.

You sighed, still shaking.
"Zhongli, I n-need help." I said with tears crowding my eyes once more.

Zhongli's looked at you with worried eyes. He stepped over to you and wrapped your arm over his shoulder and helped guide you into the parlor. He walked you up a set of stairs and into a guest bedroom.

"I will fix your wounds," He said as helped you onto the sofa, "Please explain what happened, y/n."

You looked down at your hands. Tearing dripping onto your knees, "It was Childe."

Zhongli's eyes widened, "Childe? What did he do?"
He picked up a roll of bandages and signaled for you to lift your shirt. You complied, but you moved slow.
He slowly changed your dressing. He was gentle, but not as gentle as Childe. Neither did he wrap your wounds like Childe did. You wiped your puffy eyes, "It was all a l-lie," you huffed in between more sobs.

"I trusted him, but he was just playing me. He wants me d-d-dead." Your voice broke. You began to hyperventilate as more tears trickled out of your eyes.

Zhongli felt crushed. He's known you for years. Even though you were part of the Fatui, he still cared for you like he was your father. He couldn't bare to see you cry, let alone over Childe.

You leaned forward and engulfed Zhongli into a tight hug. You cried into his chest, you needed someone to comfort you.

"Why me, Zhongli?! Why?" You sobbed in his arms.

He caressed your head and sighed, "It is not your fault, y/n. Do not take blame for Childe's stupidity."

Your hiccuped between your sobs, "I fucking l-loved h-h-*hic* him."

"Y/N, calm down." Zhongli hushed, "Can I explain something to you?" He rocked between his feet, still holding him in his arms. It was a soothing method he knew worked on you.

You weren't listening. You were drunk on your tears and boy break up depression, "We even had sex! And he was great! Why me?!"

Zhongli shook you, "Y/N!" He raised his voice.

You shook out of your daze and stared up at him sniffling, "I-I'm sorry."

"I'm going to tell you something that Childe may not have told you. Are you willing to listen?" He asked, lightly wiping the tears from your eyes.
You nodded.
He sat you down on the couch, you on one end him on the other. He oddly just had some osmanthus wine laying around, so he took a sip from the glass before opening his mouth to speak.

"When you were unconscious for those days in the hospital, Childe never left your side. He barely slept.
I visited him ever few days to check up on you as well as him. He refused to eat, sleep, or do anything. He cried. He was worried sick, wondering if you would ever come back to him." Zhongli explained, "The look on his face as he carried your limp body from inside the Golden House. He blamed himself tremendously. He cried everyday until you woke up."

You felt like you were going to faint, and Zhongli could see it in your face. He quickly grabbed the glass of water that stand next to the glass of wine on the table. He quickly put it to your lips, "Drink. My story isn't finished."

You chugged it. You stared blankly at the floor, taking in the information you just heard. It didn't make sense. If he loved you so much, why did he say those things? It seemed too real to be acting, but none of it added up. You turned your attention back to Zhongli, signaling for him to continue.

"He told me everything." He admit.

"Everything? So you knew he would do this?!" You scoffed, betrayed.

"No, No, not that plan, but how he felt about you. I don't know what the hell is going through that empty skull of his." Zhongli massaged his temples, "It makes no sense for his betrayal, I detected no deceit in his voice when he was talking with me beside your bed."

You felt torn, but your heart told you to believe Zhongli. Maybe it's because you love Childe. You want to believe he's not truly evil. But your head told you to think rationally, that he was lying.

"What do I do, Zhongli?" You asked, eyes pleading for answers.

He ruffled his hand in your hair, "You need to get some rest, little lady. Hu Tao will assist you in the morning. Please, grant me one wish and sleep."

You closed you eyes and nodded, you reached out for Zhongli. He leaned your body against his and helped guide you to bed.

"I think I can get it from here. Thank you Zhongli." You gently smiled.

He shook his head, and gentle smile at his lips.
"Do not worry about it, y/n. Goodnight."

You crawled into the guest bed, wincing in pain from every movement. You pulled the covers over your body and rest your head on the pillow. You let out a satisfied sigh, finally able to rest on an actual bed. You stared up at the ceiling, blinking your eyes sleepily.

I'm so conflicted.
What do I do?
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Chapter 17- End.