Oblivion [winrina au]

21 | shower thoughts

Avery (w)

The party last night was wild. We didn't get drunk like planned, but partying with Olivia was really out of this world. She was fun to be with. Last night was definitely another side of her. She wasn't this serious doctor I knew, she was loud and carefree, like she wasn't a doctor at all.

Turning my phone on, a message appeared on the screen. Huh. Speaking of the devil.

['Good morning! Hope you didn't have a hangover like I did. Sucks to be me because I have to work. Something urgent came up :(']

'Good morning, Alvarez. What happened? Are you at the hospital right now?'

['Unfortunately. My patient had panic attacks. A really bad one. I believe her visitor triggered something traumatic. Have to take care of it now.']

'I'll drive by. Want to grab some lunch together?'

'[Please. That would be lovely, Frey.']

'You got it. :)'

Tossing my phone on the bed, I headed towards the shower and did my thing. Gianni isn't home and being here all alone wasn't really an option. I guess I want to be around someone.

With the shower on, I closed my eyes. The warm water traced down my skin, the heat making me feel at ease. A scene came to mind.

"It's okay.. I won't hurt you. I promise." I said, slowly moving towards her small fragile body.

"Let me accompany you to the shower, alright? You're safe." I slowly reached for her arm and held it gently, pulling her out of her usual space.

"There we go.." I said, making our way inside the bathroom.

The sound of the shower startled her when I turned it on. I pressed the heater, not wanting her to get a cold bath. I need her to calm down so a hot shower would do.

She turned her back on me, her arms covering her chest as the water falls down on her.

That's where I saw her scars.

Long, deep cuts trailed her back and bruises were still visible on her pale skin. "Who did this to you?..." I whispered under my breath, helping her put some soap on her back. When my hand touched her scars, she gasped, trembling hard as I try my best to apply the soap as gently as possible.

I couldn't imagine how painful these were. How traumatizing it was— what she's been through.

"River.." her name escaped my mouth, my chest heaving up and down. I hugged myself, touching my bare back trying to remember what it felt like touching her skin.

Her embrace. Her warmth. Her touch. Her lips on mine. Her heartbeat.

How is it possible to feel her when it only happened in my little fantasy?

"Stop getting inside my head." I whispered.

I hate thinking about her. The images flashing are like flashbacks from a memory wanting to get lost in a trance.

It hurts me, but the thing is, she's the kind of heartbreak that didnt happen at all.