Prey

Chapter 77

Xander's POV:

Sleep hadn't taken me yet and I doubted that it was going to any time soon.

I just couldn't get comfortable. Couldn't relax.

The trusty pillow I've kept between my arms as I slept for years now wasn't doing it for me anymore.

Not ever since it got a massive upgrade.

No. She was far more than the word 'upgrade'.

I'd only had the luxury of sleeping with her beside me for two nights.

Actually, one and a half if we're going to be technical.

Only one and a half and now it was like the totality of me wouldn't be satisfied enough if she wasn't here.

Though I did know that that wasn't the only reason I couldn't relax

The other was that I promised her safety and now she was somewhere that I couldn't be there to guarantee it.

I've heard a bit about how they handle that place from Nico, and know that how they get treated can vary between barely humane, and straight-up barbaric.

She didn't seem to care too much, but even with the growth she had since leaving that pet shop, it was times like that where I noticed the hold that place still had on her whether she was aware of it or not.

They grow up believing that being treated like that is normal. To accept things as they came.

She would show signs of it even back when Layla was an issue.

I think the first time she outwardly did the opposite was after that night that I failed her so horrendously after the faith she'd put in me.

After that entire mess, I thought that maybe she'd broken away from that habit.

But then she just so casually mentioned how her life was supposed to end on her twenty-fifth birthday.

A reminder of a fact that had stayed hidden in the back of my thoughts and hearing her say it with such nonchalance sparked up that protective instinct that was set on her into overdrive.

It was how she grew up... And as terrible as it sounds, it wasn't an uncommon way to raise the girls born into this industry.

Hers just had more... specified details added to it, as she so gently told me by the fountain that day.

Which also made me sick the more I thought about it...

I rolled onto my stomach, my groan being muffled by my pillow.

I wanted her to have so much more.

To live the life she deserved after the hell she had to crawl through while I finally got my shit together.

I wanted to help her realize that her life was in her hands.

Even though just thinking about what could possibly lie ahead for her was overwhelming to the point where she couldn't sleep.

I wanted to see her thrive in a world she hasn't had the opportunity to properly know. And I'd just be there to offer what I could.

As long as she wanted me there...

I buried my face deeper into the pillow, catching the faintest hint of her still lingering from this morning.

The action mixed with my previous thought caused a pressure in my chest.

'Try not to miss me too much.'

The teasing yet gentle words played through my mind, the memory being the only thing to help me fabricate that warmth she gave me in multiple ways while she was gone.