Love with strings detached

Chapter 40

The night is freezing but I kind of like it, the big black puffer jacket I'm wearing keeps me nice and toasty against the hard breeze. The sky is almost completely stripped of stars tonight, making the night look even darker, the lack of lighting here doesn't help either.

Miles invited me for beers on the roof of his apartment building tonight and I can't say that I wasn't shocked.

"It has been a long time since you and I sat down together," I say, lifting the slippery cold beer bottle to my lips, taking a sip.

"Yeah, I know, I haven't really been myself lately have I?" He mumbles softly, looking into the horizon.

"Ever since Eva broke up with you, you kind of spiral out of control," I say to him.

"What do you mean?" He asks me, looking down at the concrete floor.

Something tells me he knows exactly what I'm on about, he said so himself earlier, he's not how he used to be a couple of months ago.

"Meaning you started drinking more, you're not engaging much in the conversations when we're all out and you closed off to yourself."

"We used to talk about everything and now we just... don't, and I missed that," I say, holding tightly at the neck of the beer bottle.

Sometimes I miss the friendship me and he used to have but we've grown up, we changed and our situations changed as well, things wouldn't stay the same forever.

"I haven't gotten over her yet and what hurt me the most with Eva is that it seem so easy for her to break it off with me. Like she was waiting for an opportunity to do that and once the long-distance came into play with us going to different cities to study she took it immediately," he says, stopping only to take another big sip of his beer, gaze glued to the dark blue sky.

"I don't think she was as into me as I was into her and that hurts to know."

"That hurts to think like that. You can't know for sure if that's the case unless she tells you that," I say trying to soothe his pain, even just a little bit.

I don't really know how to help someone get over a romantic heartbreak, I've never experienced that and hopefully, I never will.

"Maybe, but I can just tell from her behaviour and who's to guarantee she was going to tell me the truth," he says shrugging.

"Have you spoken with her at all?" I ask, leaning my head back on the short grey wall.

"We haven't, even though she said that we'll keep in touch," he says as his eyes get teary.

"Have you reached out to her?"

"Oh, plenty of times. I texted her when she moved out to uni, then when her course started and then when it was her birthday more recently but she ignored my messages," he says as I wince, ouch.

I've met Eva, she seemed like a nice girl and she did seem to like him a lot but people can fake their emotions really well these days so, maybe I was wrong about her.   

"That's harsh," I say sighing.

"You have no idea and I saw yesterday that she posted a picture on Instagram with a new guy," he says, chuckling while keeping his gaze on the dirty floor.

"Are you sure he's a boyfriend and not just a friend?"

"Well, seeing that in the first pictures she was sitting on his lap and in the next one kissing him on the lips I'll say I'm sure."

"And oh, how could I almost forget the caption that said 3 months with this guy so many more to come," he says, shaking his head.

"Mate, I think you should unfollow her from everywhere and stop reaching out to her is ruining you. Is clear that she's completely done with you and moved on," I say, placing my arm around his shoulders.

"I know, I already did that, I even deleted her phone number. I want to move on from her as well, I did enough suffering I think," he says, turning to give me a sad smile.

"You did and she's not worth it. There're better girls out there for you that will love you ten times more than she ever did," I say, seeing him give me a genuine smile this time.

"Yeah, you're right," he says, looking at his dirty shoe.

"What about Emma?" I ask, making him snap his head towards me.

"What about her?" He says, holding back a smile.

"Well, she seems like a nice girl and she chose you to do that dare with," I say smirking.

I think she and him could start something.

"That's probably because the rest of you have something going on with someone else," he says.

"Aaron is single just like you from the team that night but she still went for you," I say, raising an eyebrow.

"That's just cause I'm better looking than him," he says, making both of us chuckle.

"I'm serious Miles," I say, seeing him run his hand through his hair.

"I know you are and don't get me wrong she seems like a sweetheart and she's really pretty but I don't know. I guess I haven't thought about dating anyone else but maybe it's time, I'll see," he says, shrugging.

"Anyway, enough about me. I'm not the only one with a love life now so, how are you and Daisy?" He asks, smirking at me.

"We're really good, things are going nice and smoothly for us," I say, shifting my gaze to the night sky.

"And what about your feelings for her?" He asks.

"I really like her and I do think that if things go well between us I can even...love her one day," I say as he shakes me, making me laugh.

"Oh, Theo, mate I'm so happy for you. You deserve this and so much more," he says smiling.

"But how are you feeling, in general?" He asks, looking at me with squinted eyes.

"I'm anxious, scared, excited and impatient all at the same time at the idea of loving someone again," I say, sighing.

"I'm so happy that you're finally taking a step further and opening up again to the idea of love," he says, hugging me. 

I'm happy for myself as well. I've lived in fear of this feeling for so many years now and at last, I'm finally taking those baby steps towards a better future for myself.

A/N

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and stay tuned for the next one as two people seem to be surprisingly dating...Can you guess who?👀🤨

Please don't forget to comment & vote ❤️

I hope you have a lovely Sunday! Xx

All the love - M ❤️