Talking to Tom

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I wake up and it's 7am. Caroline is whining a tiny bit but not fully crying.

I roll over and sit up, I grab her out of the bayonet and she falls asleep. Her little arm lays across my chest and her face nuzzled into my boob and armpit.

She is so cuddly, I love it.

I look back and Tom is sleeping. I'll just stay in here because she's not crying.

I lay there and start to kinda drift off to sleep but I make myself stay awake. I need to get up.

It's 8 now, I can wake up tom right? She's waking up a little. One I need to pee, two I'm starting to get hungry, three I'm bored.

I sit up and little and nudge Tom.

"Tom...wake up"

He groans and rolls over slightly. "Babe you need to wake up, I have to go to the bathroom..take Caroline"

I poke him again so he opens his eyes, once he sees me I shove Caroline to his grasp. I get up and go to the bathroom, OW!

The second I stepped on the floor and stood upright everything ached. I might of fell a little, just a tad.

I got to the toilet and I completely forgot that I just popped out a baby and I hurt like hell. You know babies are like small but not small enough! Caroline is around average but my heart goes out to women who have like 10+ pound babies. My gosh that must hurt.

I'm not sure if I would of gotten the epidural if I could've of. I was already to dilated to get it, I mean it went fast enough so it wasn't as painful.

I walk back and Tom is sit up against the head board shirtless holding Caroline. His eyes are closed and his head in tilted back.

I grab Caroline from his arms and hold her upright on my chest. "Tom hunny you can go back to bed, it's alright"

"No no I'll stay-m fine.."

He stumbles over words. "I'll be in the living room, feeding Caroline...get some rest."

I pat his shoulder and kiss his forehead.

My little man child.

-

Sorry this is so short, I had a really bad start to my week and today was just terrible. I got in touch with an old friend and honestly he has made it so much better and my current friend (love you aurora) is always so sweet and was checking up on me. Just know that if anything is going on just find some people or a person to talk with. It can really help.

Sending love your way, kiss <3