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I looked up some numbers to help you with stress and the authorities were almost sent to the house because I wasn't completely 'up to there standards' with my mentality.

Which obviously, my fiancé almost killed our baby so I don't think I should be okay.

It's been two days and I have no idea where he went but I haven't let go of Caroline. I'm just scared that something will happen again.

We have both been eating well and she has been sleeping well, I could be better at sleeping but it's alright.

I cant stop thinking about what he said.... "It's our baby" oh if it's our baby then why did you try and kill it, it's going to be annoying it's a baby! I feel like I should call him...

No

I'm calling the courthouse and making him have zero custody. Absolutely zero. I need someone to come, my mom.

"Hi mama"

"hi claire"

"I need you to come, it's a really long story and I'll tell you when you are here, but you need to please come"

"Is everything alright? I'll leave tonight, do I need to call someone or bring something?"

"No, just yourself, thank you"

"I'll text you when I'll leave, be careful"

Her voice just calms me down, so soothing.

Caroline is sleeping now, in the bayonet right next to the couch. I have some tv on and I made some tea. I'm doing perfectly fine but I'm really not. I haven't fully let out what I need too. I'm glad I am able to have people come and help me. This is what happens with single parents, it gets very overwhelming and you need to get out and can't. Kids die all the time because of there caregivers and babies die of SBS.

I wasn't ready to have my baby die, no one is. I am glad I got to her in time, I have no idea what I would of done if I didn't.



Author note

Okay, this was interesting to make. Hence the long timeframe between this and the last chapter. I have no experience and know nobody close to me who has experienced a death of a baby. I am thankful I can say that, but for people who can, I am very sorry. I know how this happens and I know how hard it is for the family. It breaks my heart how it happens so easily, in literally seconds. So please understand why this is a very hard point of the story and for Claire.

I am sorry this took awhile to make, I have really been busy. This is also a really short chapter. I didn't want to put a lot or else I wouldn't of been able to stop. I am on a car ride to a game so I thought this was the best time. Until I post again, tschüss.

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