hating me for loving you {h.s}

Chapter 28.

PHOEBE'S POV:

  I don't know how long I had been asleep, but a knock on the front door woke me up from a not so deep sleep.

  Sleep was the last thing on my mind, so you can imagine how fast I shot up at the knock.

  What if it was Allison? What if she's still keeping track of me? The tracker had to be on my car if she found me from the coffee shop to Ashlyn's house last night.

  Now she knows where I live... The one time I needed to think about things, I took my selfishness and used it.

  Fuck.

  There's always the chance of it being Harry at the door, but why would he want to come to me after I stormed out on him?

  If I was sitting in his position and was upset like that, and he walked out on me while I was trying to explain myself, I would be more upset than anything.

  But the way I reacted was valid to me, so why am I doubting myself every chance I get?

  I'm really hoping it is H, though. I just don't know what he'd say, or what kind of state he'd be in.

  He's always handled these situations with alcohol, or something along those lines.

  If he were to turn out drunk at my door, there's no chance I'd turn him away, that's just wrong. Especially with the shit we've already overcome.

  I'd be disappointed, yes. But I know he'd be more disappointed in himself than I'd be, and I wouldn't want to beat his feelings up more than he already has himself.

  Finally going full force, I turned the handle to open the door.

  Harry.

  I let out the biggest sigh of relief, I don't know what I would've done if it was my mom.

  He looked okay, he just looked tired. I can tell he'd been crying, his eyes were puffy and red, it hurts my heart to see him like that.

  I also saw the familiar ice cream in his hand.

  The first thing he did was put a small smile on his face, but I could tell it was fake. I can always tell when something is off, especially after knowing what had happened tonight.

  I accepted the ice cream gesture, setting it on the table quickly before turning my attention back to him at my door.

  I decided to wrap my arms around his neck, bringing him into the most comforting hug I could give him right now.

  That's what helps me when I'm like this, just a nice, long hug.

  "I'm so sorry..." He cried into my shoulder, all his tears collecting on my long crewneck that I put on to sleep in.

  The ache in his voice hurt more than words from my mouth ever could express, I don't think I've seen him more vulnerable than he has been tonight. He doesn't like to cry in front of me if he doesn't have to, but I guess that feeling finally caught up to him like I knew it would.

  "Sh...Sh... It's okay. You're okay..." I reassured him, I know I was the upset one, but I'm pushing all my feelings aside for him just like Ashlyn said, and it feels like the right answer at the moment.

  I feel more than horrible, the vomiting feeling in my throat is catching up to me, I never wanted to hurt him with how I felt, but still, the way I felt was more than valid. I was allowed and still am allowed to be upset with him.

  The only reason I got so upset was because he knows the troubles I have with Allison, she hasn't treated me like her child in years, so why is it so rude for me to not treat her like my mother all these years?