Endowed Shadows(Boyxboy)

Chapter 19

Luca's P.O.V(you)
When you're faced with a dilemma such as the one I was facing. I stood with my back against the wall of the bathroom, my arms folded and just accompanied Wesley, rather than pounced on him. In truth, I wanted to do all sorts to him but it's not the right time. How selfish would it be? I mean Noah is literally breaking his heart over Wesley whilst I'm... in his eyes, lucky. I am lucky, I don't deny that... not at all. Perhaps speaking to Noah myself would actually work... on the other hand he could hate me again. This is insanely difficult, being part of a love triangle. I began to wonder if it was worth it... but of course it is... Wesley had saved me from myself in more ways than one.
I just really feel for Noah... upset, hurt, angry... he's crushed and it's my fault. I'd began to see Noah differently because he could have remained hating me, insulting me... and yet all Wesley did was click his fingers and Noah fell to his knees, apologising. He shouldn't have had to... he should hate me and be allowed to do so. I guess I enjoy pain so... if I asked Noah to strike at me in anyway he wanted to, to let out that hurt and frustration... it may help him. He wasn't allowed to do it before but if I let him...
I sighed and said softly.
"Wesley, I think this all might become easier if Noah is able to let out his frustrations, you know? He's had to keep it bottled up which can't be doing him any good. If he is able to have it all out with me, it may work."
Wesley looked at me for a moment,"do what you wish."he said softly. I pushed myself from the wall with my foot and knelt down at the side of the bath.
"Wesley, listen... I want you both to leave on good terms, I don't want Noah to hate you or your memory. This isn't about me, it's about you both... and I got in the way and ruined it. He's probably aching to hit me, if he does... he's loosened himself up to actually breaking down... and then after that what else is there but moving on? At the moment he's in limbo, trapped inside his heart filled with love for you. It can't be easy on Ralph either, and Ralph is my best friend... it's probably hurting him too. Don't be angry with me, please, I'm doing it to help you both part on good terms."
"I know that." He looked at me,"just do what you wish, right now I'm open to anything Luca." He sighed. I placed my hand in the bath water and scooped up some bubbles, putting them on his nose. I smiled softly and gently smoothed his hair, kissing his head as I stood up.
"I will make this right, I promise."
"I love you thank you. Everything I hate when people solve my problems, but I'm kind of lost right now. I want him to be happy I don't want him hooked on me any more." Wesley smiled slightly, then walked over and sat in the bath tub. I halted at the door, then turned to face him.
"Hey, your problems are my problems too. And seen as I'm a third to blame in this thing between you too, it's only fair. Just relax in there and I'll be back. I promise."
I blew him a kiss and then unlocked the bathroom door, opening it and leaving the bathroom. Where would he be? I walked down the hall to where he usually occupies his room with Ralph. I gently knocked on the door and waited. It opened after a few minutes and I saw Ralph.
"I want to talk to Noah, it's important. Is he in there?"
"Yes he is. I'll leave." Ralph smiled slightly then hugged me,"good luck dear." Oh Christ if he's wishing me good luck then it's not even going well for him... I smiled back gently and winked at him.
"Thank you."
I stepped into the bedroom then and shut the door, Noah was standing at his window just staring. I treaded cautiously...
"Noah, can I come in and talk?"
"You are in, aren't you? What do you want?" He didn't turn to face me but as I stepped up beside him I felt so guilty, the definition would be far too long to describe it.
"We're alone, there's nobody else here to stop you... go for it. I know you want to, deep down you hate me, right?"
Noah turned around to face me fully and I flinched a little. He frowned at me, his tone really quiet.
"Lucas I don't want to do anything, what's done is done. I can't change it by hurting you, and Wesley would hate me even more."
Whoa... not what I was expecting at all. I'd thought he'd have jumped at the chance to hit me whilst nobody was around to stop him. It turns out it wasn't an act, he really didn't hate me.
"True, but you can't leave things this way. You'll regret it once he's gone, you know you will. He's hurt too, and it's not his fault if he doesn't love you the same anymore... hey where are you going?"
Noah walked by me and went out of the room. I followed him quickly as I struggled to breathe.
"Noah, wait... I haven't finished yet."
He walked up to the top deck and then stopped, turning around to face me, quickly.
"You need to stop trying to bait me, Lucas. I'm not going to hit you. Just leave me alone, I really need to forget it all... Ralph is..."
"My best friend... and I don't want him to be your 'rebound' guy, get it? He's special to me, as is Wesley. And right now you're hurting Ralph more... the only thing stopping you from moving forward is your concealed rage... you haven't been allowed to rage over it, so now I'm telling you. Rage, get it all out... break down... then let Ralph heal you. Trust me, he's good at it, his heart is pure gold."
Noah shook his head and looked away. I folded my arms and decided to play dirty...
"Also... do you want to compare notes on how well Wesley can kiss? Because he's damn good... and, it's great when he holds me too."
Noah glared at me, his eyes flaming. "Stop it, Lucas. It's not working."
I grinned. "Oh it totally is, I can see it. You hate it and me more than you're letting on. Well, even though we've not actually done anything that serious yet, we've still played together... and it was fun. But now he's quite vicious so..."
And there it was... a loud and painful smash of a fist hitting bone echoed over the sea... I fell to the floor but I grinned. I knew he wanted to... I'm not stupid. I held my jawbone and stood up, backing away a little.
"See... I told you."
"What do you want from me, a parade? So you were right, but that doesn't mean I hate you. I just... I just feel lost. I really loved him, Lucas... and it hurts. I don't want to use Ralph because he's sweet and lovely... but my heart is aching so much and I can't breathe!"
He fell to his knees and instead of mocking him for it, I dropped to mine and wrapped my arms around his shoulders as I whispered softly.
"I will take care of him, I promise. But for me to look after him properly, Noah I need you to make your peace with him properly. Until then... I refuse to leave Ralph in your care."
I kissed his cheek and stood up. "Think about it carefully, Noah... Ralph or Wesley... you haven't got long until I decide to take them both with me. You've already lost Wesley as a lover... don't lose him as friend too... and don't allow yourself to lose another lover through your stupidity."
I sighed and walked away... hopefully I've done enough.
Ralph was standing by the door and then grabbed my arm and spun me around,"thank you." He whispered, and hugged me. "You're a great friend." I held him tightly, because even though we'd not spent time together since coming here, I'll still miss him.
"Don't thank me, Ralph. You're the greatest person I know and you deserve your happy ending too. I just hope he chooses the right one. I'll never forget you, and as soon as we're settled I'll definitely text you."
"Wesley is thinking about turning on my service again?" He asked. I pulled back a little and smiled.
"He is yeah. Although I'm confused about it all..." I began to feel rather dizzy but tried my best to conceal it. I want my final moments with Ralph to be nice ones.
"Yeah you should get back to Wesley, I heard him talking to himself in his room or your room too?" Ralph sighed and smiled," I hope Noah picks soon." I caressed his cheek and then planted a kiss at the corner of his mouth.
"I know he'll choose you, he'd be crazy not to. With you, he'll be able to start again. I love you, Ralph." I turned and headed down the corridor to where our room was, and before entering I sagged against the door, the sweat becoming heavy, and my breathing limited. It's painful to breathe, but I don't want Wesley to worry.
I slowly opened the door and searched the room. I called out.
"Wesley, I'm back."
"Luca are you okay?" He asked and wrapped me in a warm hug,"I mean how you're feeling.you feel a little warm" Wesley picked me up and had me lay down on the bed. My body trembled a little but I smiled a little.
"I'm okay... just cold." I kept my eyes on him and my heart jolted. "Wesley, I think there's something wrong, inside... everything feels strange, it's like I've drank acid."
Wesley cuddled up to me and wrapped his arms around me,"it'll be fine,shhh." He sighed and kissed my neck,"I think my bite did something to you, so you probably are changing."
"I feel like I'm in Twilight... this is ridiculous... now I know how Bella felt." I smirked but as I'd said that a rather shocking pain engulfed my entire body in a nanosecond, and because it didn't thrill me in the least, I arched my back and let out a cry. I gripped onto the duvet, my body shook a little as the cold became unbearable. I let out a breath and it escaped me in the form of a white cloud. What the hell is happening to me? This continued for about two minutes until the pain finally won my battle of trying to stay awake and then the darkness took my last will to fight.