ENIGMA II Countryhumans AU

Journal Entry #10: I'm Not Him

Anglo has been acting very weird today. I'm not sure if he kept talking to himself, because I couldn't take it anymore and ended up falling asleep. When I woke up, he was asleep too. Some of the footage went static, so I can't go back and check what happened when I fell asleep...

Note to self: Buy new security cameras.

But like I told him yesterday, we're going to be doing more tests together. He was surprisingly more cooperative today. Maybe he's getting used to it. If he is, then that's great! At least there's something good going on today.

During the tests, he seemed to be... A bit aloof. You'd think that maybe he was tired. He's been talking to himself and doing other random scheiße all night, so maybe he didn't get enough sleep. Nein... It's currently 2 PM. I purposely made the tests be in the afternoon so he could sleep some more hours because I truly care for him. 

As for the tests, I took some blood samples, a basic check-up, and his most hated 'Flashy thingies tube' - aka me doing another x-ray scan on him. 

After that, I gave him some more dog treats as his prize for his cooperation. Then he skedaddled off while munching on his favourite snack. He's been running all around the facility again. Of course, I haven't forgotten about him talking to himself last night, so I decided to monitor him again with the security cameras. 

He ran back into the testing chamber again. Then he just stopped himself, and then told himself that the tests were over. For some reason, he just looked so confused that the tests were done. Does he not remember?

Surely, he couldn't forget that quickly right? It just happened an hour and a half earlier, and Anglo is not one to have a memory that bad. 

And yet again, he had another conversation with himself. He asked himself if the tests were done, he nodded, and then asked himself why he didn't know. And then he answered, "Du hast geschlafen, also habe ich es ohne dich gemacht."

I don't understand at all what he meant by ' You were asleep '. 

I mean sure sleepwalking is a thing, but that wasn't the case at all. I know with all my soul that he was wide awake. He was fully aware of what was happening. Second, why is he telling himself this?? 

Nothing makes sense at all! And when you think you finally maybe have gotten an answer or maybe a possible theory of how all of this could happen, nein! It'll only end up leading to absolutely nowhere... 

Just when I thought I was finally able to get to know Anglo, I only get pulled further and further away from him. It's stressful, and utmost confusing...

I mean, I haven't even gotten closer to possibly understanding his body works. I

I'm trying so hard to make sense of everything he is, but I can't. He truly is an enigma.

Sometimes I don't even know what to do anymore...