98: Same

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"It's fine! Recently a friend told me the same thing..." She cleared her throat, feeling embarrassed. "I'm bunking at his place for now."

"His place?" Hikaru interrupted. His voice was sharp as he stared at her. "A guy?"

Aw crap.

"Um." Amber faltered, her voice cracking a little. "He's nice!"

"Does he have a soulmate?"

"Uhhh."

Her reply seemed to confirm his suspicions, revealing to him everything he needed to know. His face darkened while his eyes narrowed into slits that dripped with his jealousy and hostility.

"You're not going back!" He snapped, turning the wheel as he spun the car to a U-turn. "You can't!"

"He's not going to do anything to me!" She blurted out, gripping her seat belt frantically.

Well, he might give her more orgasms. She pinked, swallowing those words down before her treacherous mouth decided to tell Hikaru that extra titbit of information.

"You don't know that," Hikaru grumbled out. His protective streak was spiking. Goddamnit. Amber groaned.

"You can't tell me what I can and cannot do!" She snapped back sharply. Her soulmate tensed at her words and she paled feeling a little guilty. Shit. Was that going a little too far?

"I'm sorry, my love," Hikaru sighed, running his fingers through his hair. His voice was sad, tinged with his apology and guilt. Soft and pleading. "I'm just...I can't take it. The idea of you in danger and the thought of you so close to someone else aside from me. Someone who might find you just as attractive as I do."

He bit his lips. "I need to know that you're mine. That you're mine and mine only. Forever." His eyes met hers, pleading and glistening with his need. "Please understand?" He whispered.

Mine.

Mine only.

Forever.

Fuck.

His words resounded within her chest, pounding in her head like shards of ice that pierced into her flesh again and again. She felt like shit, like a piece of trash fluttering in the landfill. The kind that was not combustible but toxic and useless. Practically, a waste of space in this universe.

She hated this. Hated lying to him, hated her situation. But she couldn't bring herself to say those words now. Especially since he'd expressed such strong feelings against it.

Thank God she didn't tell him about her other six soulmates.

"You don't have to worry," she spoke numbly.

Her voice sounded far away in her head. Inside, she was trembling with her fear and worry. She could almost taste the sour tang of tears at the back of her throat. "I've always been yours. Always."

Just not only yours.

She wanted to say those words but they failed to make it past her lips and Hikaru raised her hand to press a kiss to her palm. A few minutes ago, her soul bond would have reacted to his touch but now she could barely feel it. The warmth was replaced by this deep wrenching horrible feeling of guilt.

"Let's stay at a hotel, tonight? We'll think about this tomorrow," he smiled, pleased at her response. "I want to take a look at your feet. You might have gotten injured."

"Okay..." She nodded, a false smile spreading across her cheeks. A while ago, his words would have warmed her but now she could only think about her future incoming doom.

A future that seemed murky with uncertainty and filled with possibilities of her loneliness. A future that seemed to waver close to one involving fighting, and an eventual choice for her to make. Who would she choose? She swallowed the lump in her throat, her eyes welling up a little. How could she choose?

How could she choose when she wanted them all just the same?

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