❝𝖽𝖾𝗌𝗉𝖾𝗋𝖺𝗍𝗂on

part five - ❝I can see

TW: DEPRESSION AND SUICIDE THOUGHS

After we shot the scene scarlett just go away with tears in her eyes, I go after her. I stopped her before she got yo her trailer.

y/n: Scarlett I know that we don't know each other, but maybe you wanna talk?

She nodded, I was kinda surprised that she wanted to talk with me. She told me to get inside.

y/n: I'm so sorry for what happend, but there isn't anyway for you two to be together? Like at all? What happend if I may ask?
scarlett: Okay I can tell you, we have some time and I have to talk to someone because I'm going crazy. So last night I came to home and you know I was confused seeing my husband kissing with other women on a couch. Of course he said something like "Oh you are early darling". Then I felt that my eyes were full of tears.  I think he forgot that hes child is sleeping in the same house, and what will happend when she would wake up, how will she react, what will she say. It's not they end of the story, the girl was there for two weeks when I was on a trip with my best friends, he even told me that himself- I just can't I- can't believe it-

Scarlett's face was now all in tears, I just hugged her without any thinking I just did it, she hugged me back. Her snobbing was so loud, and her breath was so quick, I felt so bad for her that I start crying myself. She looked at me at starts beeing sorry. I just anserwed her it's not her fault at all. I rubbed her back and I was hugging her till she calm down, and that take a while to be honest, but I didn't care if that was 10 minutes or 10 hours. I didn't expect my first day of shooting to look like this...

After shooting next scene about training in red room I get back to my trailer, and I do nor know maybey because scarlett was crying, all my depression and anxiety came back as fast as light switch, I thought I was over it, that I win the battle, why it came back, what I did?

Mabey I will explain you all how it starts. When I was 13 I was bullied in school, not because of how I look because of from where u came. As I child I was moving in and out a lot one year I was in Mexico and the next one I was at Los Angeles. I couldn't get friends, because whenn j got them I was already knowing that I will move out from this city and propably don't see them in next few weeks. As thirteen years older I wasn't ready for so many changes. Day by day, year by year I was getting worst and worst, first crying all night, then panic attacks and lastly the suicide thoughs and attempts. I was only a child, over all this teen years I was alone I had no one to tall with, my mom was working all the time and dad, well he disappeared and never came back.

But now I'm feeling like I will have a panic attack, maybe I'm not good enough for job like that, I'm too bad for this, I will only messed it up, as always. I can't no I just can't why- I was feeling that my breath was getting unbelievable fast. I have to calm down is my first day, then I jumped a little because I heard a knock.

??- I can see and hear that you not okay.