Make You Feel My Love

Chapter 5

Third Person's POV

They were all devastated with what happened. They thought that the last time they'll bring Cassy here is the time when she nearly died 8 years ago, but they were wrong. Because this is also the same scenario they witnessed 6 months ago, yun ang pinaka unang beses na nag labas siya ng kanyang hinanakit sa kanyang Ina, at unang beses din na sinaktan siya nito.

Flashback....
6 Months Ago

Cassy just got home from school and didn't realized that she came home late. Wala siyang nadatnan na tao sa sala kaya napagdesisyonan niyang umakyat na upang magpahinga. Paakyat na sana siya ng tawagin siya ni Irene.

"Aakyat ka na lang basta basta? Hindi ka man lang ba mag eeffort na hanapin kami para mag apologize man lang dahil late ka umuwi? Pinag alala mo lahat ng tao dito ah." Galit at nagtitimping sabi ni Irene. Humarap si Cassy at bumaba.

Nagmano siya sa kanyang Ama at humalik. Humalik din siya sa kanyang mga kuya. Ngunit iniwasan niya si Irene.

"Ano ba?! Nananadya ka ba?!" galit na galit na sa bi ng kanyang Ina

"You care for me pa pala? Hahahaha!" Cassy faked a laugh.

"Ok lang yan. Buti naman at naalala mo pa ako." pikon na sabi ni Cassy.

She was so tired that day at wala siyang balak makipag sagutan sa Nanay niya dahil alam niyang may masasabi siya na hindi magugustuhan ni Irene.

"What the hell Maria Cassandra Louise! Napaka bastos mo! Hindi kita tinuruan maging ganyan! Hindi kita pinalaki na ganyan! Wala kang utang na loob!"

"Sino po bang nagsabing buhayin niyo ko? Sige. Thanks for bringing me to school, for giving me food to eat, clothes to wear, and a house to live. But never ko rin naman pong ginusto na ipinanganak niyo eh. I never wanted to be born." Cassy said almost shouting.

She saw hurt in Irene's eyes. Ayaw na talaga niya humaba ang diskusyon kaya umakyat na siya. Hinabol siya ni Irene at mahigpit na kinuha ang kamay niya. Na halos masubsob si Cassy sa sakit.

"Aray!"

"Hon." nag aalalang sabi ni Greggy

"Mom tama na." Luis and Alfonso said

"Ano ka bang bata ka! Napaka bastos mo! Hindi ikaw yung Cassy na pinalaki ko! Ibalik mo yung Cassy na inalagaan ko!" Irene shouted while tears are slowly dripping from her eyes. Marahas na tinanggal ni Cassy ang kamay ng kanyang Ina.

"That Cassy is dead! That Cassy is tired of understanding her Mom! All she wanted was happiness and time na never naibigay ng Nanay niya sa kanya! Ako parin naman si Cassy eh! Yun nga lang nagbago na. Dahil nagbago ka na rin." she heavily signed.

"YOU CHANGED! YOU CHANGED ME MOM! YOU CHANGED ME! YOU ARE SO UNFAIR! SANA AKO NALANG SI CELESTE PARA MARANASAN KO ULIT YUNG PAGMAMAHAL MO! YOU ARE A GOOD WIFE AND A GOOD MOTHER TO YOUR BOYS AND TO CELESTE! HOW ABOUT ME? ANAK NIYO KO! ANAK NIYO RIN AKO! SANA HINDI NIYO NALANG AKO INI ANAK DAHIL WALA KANG KWENTANG INA!" Cassy furiously shouted to her mother.

Dumilim ang paningin ni Irene at hindi niya namalayan na binigyan niya ng dalawang napakalakas na sampal ang kanyang anak dahilan para matumba ito. Alfonso and Luis helped Cassy who is just holding her face. While Greggy was holding her wife. Calming her. Cassy never expected that her mother, the source of her strength, will hurt her like that. She never expected na gagawin ni Irene sa kanya yon. She knows that she is wrong, pero walang ibang nasa isip niya ngayon kung hindi ang pagsampal sa kanya ng kanyang Ina.

"Nagsisisi ako bakit pinanganak pa kita." Irene coldly said. Greggy held her and told her to stop.

Hindi ito pinansin ni Cassy at tumayo siya. Bumitaw siya sa kanyang mga kuya at inayos ang kanyang sarili.

"You really want to know bakit ako late umuwi? FINE! Nilock ako sa storage room ng bullies ko. Bakit? Dahil ipinagtanggol kita! Kahit hindi mo sabihin ipagtatanggol kita! Pinagtatanggol kita palagi! Sinabi nila na kaya parati kang wala sa nga events ko sa school dahil wala kang pakialam saakin, na hindi mo ako mahal, na wala akong nanay!" she said while wiping her tears.

"Malamang pinagtanggol kita kahit resulta nun eh nakulong ako! Wala eh! Mahal kita eh! Kaso ngayon? Napatunayan ko tama nga sila. Baka nga talagang wala ka na talagang pakialam saakin. Na hindi mo na talaga ako mahal. Kasi kung mahal mo ako di mo ako sasampalin eh. Iintindihin mo ako. Pasensya ka na ha? Hindi na kasi kinaya ni Cassy yung sakit na pinaparamdam mo sa kanya kaya nagbago siya. Pero sana intindihin mo din si Cassy. Hindi ako yung nagbago Ma. Kayo."

"Wag kang mag alala, sukong suko narin naman ako. Tandaan mo na kahit wala na ako, never ako nagtanim ng sama ng loob sayo. Na mahal na mahal kita kahit nasasaktan at pinapatay na ako sa sakit." Cassy said and she smiled. Pumasok na siya sa kwarto niya. She locked her room and Irene was left speechless. Lahat sila hindi makagalaw. Hanggang sa nagsalita si Alfonso.

"S-Suicidal Thoughts." the were all shocked with what he said.

"A-Ano?" Greggy said

"Shit! Nagbibigay na siya ng last words niya kanina! She's been having suicidal thoughts for how many months na! Luis get the keys ng mga kwarto!" Sabay na nakarinig sila ng parang may nabasag sa kwarto ni Cassy.

"Luis bilisan mo!" Alfonso panically said. He rushed to Cassy's room and started shouting.

"Cassy! Cassy open the door! Cassy!!!" at binigay ni Luis ang susi ng kwarto ni Cassy. They opened the door and they saw their sister already sitting in the floor, watching the blood drip from her wrist. Agad na binuhat si Cassy at dinala sa ospital.

And that was the start of Cassy being so distant and cold to everyone.

End of Flashback

Irene, Greggy, Imee, Bongbong, Luis, and Alfonso are just staring at Cassy's body. Nilapitan ito ni Irene at saktong tapos na ang visiting hours nila. Imee, together with Bongbong and the boys left the hospital. Sasama na sana nila si Irene ngunit nagpumilit ito. Nanghihina siya ngunit hindi niya kayang iwan ang kanyang anak sa ganitong sitwasyon. She is still blaming herself for this. Inaya na siya matulog ni Greggy sa sofa ngunit hindi siya pumayag at siya nalang daw ang magbabantay kay Cassy, wala namang nagawa ang kanyang asawa kaya hinayaan nalang muna niya ito.

It's 5:30am and Irene is still not sleeping. She is caressing her daughter's hair and was just staring at her.

"You know mahal ko, the day I knew I was pregnant with you was the happiest day of my life. I prayed so hard for you, your dad and I were in Rome that time and I remember na Vatican City talaga sadya ko. I prayed so hard to God na ibigay ka saakin. Then there you were the best birthday, christmas, new year, and valentine's day gift anak. The day I gave birth to you, the moment you were out of my body, and heard you cry? It was the best feeling mahal ko. I also felt that when I gave birth to your brothers, pero iba yung naramdaman ko sayo anak. The day you came out, the moment that they gave you to me nawala yng pagod ko from labor to delivery. Because you are worth it anak. The first time I saw you grabe yung saya ng puso ko. You got my eyes, my mouth, and my face. While you got your Dad's nose and skin color. You are so precious and beautiful baby. You are worth every pain. And I'll do it again kung ikaw lang naman ang kapalit nung sakit." Irene softly said to Cassy while holding her hand. Pinunasan niya ang mga luhang tumutulo sa kanyang mata.

"Cassy anak, you were Mommy's ray of sunshine, baby you were and will always be Mommy's source of light in my life. Anak, my life became dark ever since you became so distant. And it's my fault. I'm so sorry mahal ko. I'm sorry for all the pain I've caused you ha? Anak after natin dito Mommy will be yours. Sayong sayo lang ako. Mahal na mahal ka ni Mommy. Mommy will not be happy kung wala ka anak. You completed us. You completed me baby. Please, forgive me anak ko. Always remember that Mommy will always be here alright? She'll never leave you. Pagkagising mo, you can tell me anything hurt me with words, o di kaya mag rant, or ibuhos mo yung sama ng loob at galit mo saakin. Tell me everything anak. Alright? Je t'aime tellement mon soleil. Maman t'attendra ok?? (I love you so much my sunshine. Mommy will wait for you ok?) Matutulog muna ako mahal ko. I hope you'll wake up na pagkagising ko."

Irene kissed her hand and her forehead. Hinaplos haplos niya ang mukha ng kanyang anak at hinalikan ang kanyang labi. Pumunta na siya sa may sofa at natulog.

Little did she know that Cassy was already awake and heard everything her Mom said.