Chase Me

Age

S a g e

It's been a long long time and mommy hasn't come home yet. What is she doing? Well, I hope she's having fun!

Danial and I sleep in the same room! We are like...siblings!

But, I hope mommy's coming back. Austin says mommy's gone but where would she go? I know mommy wouldn't leave me.

I just know it. 

Today is my birthday and today I'm five! I just wish mommy would be here. Every birthday we always go to an ice cream shop and she would buy me presents! maybe she will surprise me and come for my birthday.

"Sage!" I gasp when I hear mommy's voice I run downstairs and frown when I see Austin's friend "Hi" she smiles. 

"I thought you were mommy," I say and they both look sad "Why are you sad, I can cheer you up!" I smile and start dancing I smile as I hear them laugh. 

Then I gasp when I see daniel with a mad face and he's holding his toy, the one I broke. I started yelling and running. "Ahhhh!" I yell as I make my way outside.

A u s t i n

It's been a while since her death and I can't learn to put the bottle away. So, instead of drinking, I started smoking. Everyone tells me I need to take care of the kids but I am! 

And I'm trying really really hard just sometimes when I see Sage all I see is her mother.

I miss her so much. I visit her every day. Sage still thinks she's coming back but the truth is she's gone and she's not coming back.

"Hey, they look cute together" I turn to the kids when my sister tells me and I smile "yeah, they do"

"I'm so sorry she's gone"

"hey!" I snap when I see my sister look at me "hey man, you good?" she says with a worried face and I nod "yeah, yeah"

"bro, if you ever want to talk I'm here for you" she smiles "I know, I know"  I put on a fake smile and walk to the kitchen. I get a glass of water trying to calm me down. 

I want to cry.

Instead, I let a few tears drop but I wipe them. I have to be strong for my kids. When Bella found out she had cancer she made me legal guardian over Sage. 

I protect both of them with my life. 

But, even though it pains me to see Sage miserable I keep my head up for the kids. And for her. 

~~~~~~~~~

We started shopping for Sage's Birthday, we got ice cream, presents and we went ice skating. I just really wish she was here to see this. 

"Daddy!" I hear Sage call me.

Did she call me daddy?

I smile "coming!" I step on the ice and start walking, It's actually really easy once you know what to do. 

"what's wrong?" I say looking as she sits on the cold ice. "I want to walk with Daniel but he doesn't want me to be with him" she frowns. Yep, Daniel's getting older and he wants space from Sage, but maybe that's because Daniel likes Sage. 

I hope. 

"You want to skate with daddy?" I say and she smiles and claps her hands excited "Yeah!" I grab her tiny hand and we start walking slowly. 

She giggles as daniel falls on his butt. "OW," he says and we stop and I grab his hand and we start walking together. 

Just like a family.