𝐇𝐮𝐬𝐡 𝐌𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐲

Forty Nine | Announcement

TOM

12:52pm. London time. My hands are shaking, my ears are ringing and I can feel my heartbeat in my fucking stomach.

"I don't think we will need to chemistry test them with you because your characters aren't really supposed to have chemistry you know? I think it'll work out," Y/N said to me bringing us both bottles of beer to the outdoor table I was sitting at.

To be completely honest, what she said went in one ear and out the other. I couldn't focus on anything but my blank laptop screen.

"Thanks darling, and uh, yeah sounds good about the uh, the chemistry tests," I said glancing up at her and reaching for the beer.

"Cheers," she said smiling and sitting down next to me.

I clinked my bottle against hers and sipped my drink. The sip then turned to gulps, the gulps turned into consistent swallows and before I knew it, I had sculled the entire beer; ending with a large burp.l and a stunned look from Y/N.

"Someone's feeling nervous," she joked, putting her hand on top of mine and rubbing her thumb across my skin.

The Golden Globes we're announcing this years nominations via livestream at 6am Los Angeles time, which was 1pm our time and now six minutes away. Given the schedule of my filming and what had been released in the past twelve months, I was crossing my fingers to get a nomination for The Crowded Room or Uncharted 2.

Award panels are pricks to action movies though. Seriously, can you think of many Marvel movies that get nominated for Oscars or Globes or anything prestigious? No, because action movies always get snubbed.

So my best chance was for The Crowded Room, a short series on Apple where I played Billy Milligan. Honestly, it was one of the hardest acting jobs I've ever had to do so I'm really gunning for some sort of recognition from it. It's a series too, so Oscars are out of the running. The Globes were my best bet.

"How long until the livestream starts?" She asked, in which I promptly responded with: five minutes.

"I can't watch this shit," I said shutting my laptop screen before opening it again and quickly logging in.

"No wait, I have to watch, I need to know," I rambled, leaning my elbows on the table and running both of my hands through my hair.

Harry wasn't home, he was at his mates house which kind of made me feel better. Because after all, if I don't get nominated, there's one less person to be looking sad in the house and pitying me.

"Another beer?" Y/N chuckled, rubbing my arm and standing out of her chair to go back inside. I was watching the countdown on the livestream, every second ticking away in front of my eyes.

It was fucking excruciating.

I walked inside to follow Y/N to the kitchen, leaning down to get a liquor bottle from the wine rack and asking her if she wanted a shot with me.

"Scotch? Really?" She said screwing her face up.

"I can't fucking think straight," I groaned, leaning over across the kitchen counter and squishing my face against the stone top. She was right, scotch won't calm my nerves.

"Hey, look at me, it's my turn to take your mind off things now. Normally I'm the one freaking out and you're the rock, you're my rock Tom," she said pulling me back up by my shoulders as if I were made of jelly.

"I just don't want to know the result... I know they're going to snub Uncharted but Crowded was my most intense acting ever... If they snub me for that too I will just feel so fucking amateur and weak you know?" I sighed, my true fear now bubbling to the surface.

I am constantly petrified of not being good enough. Every role I take, every scene I shoot, I need to be better. I need to prove people wrong.

"Listen to me, you are never going to be weak. Look at that, look at that right there. Is that weak?" Y/N said squeezing my bicep and laughing.

"You know what I mean... I just, I don't want to be let down," I sighed. I don't have my phone on me, I don't know what time it is. This is actually kind of good, I'm semi-distracted.

"You either get nominated and that's great, or, you don't get nominated and you show the dumb awards panel what Tom Holland can really do," she said holding my face with her hands.

I took a deep breath in and out, which she told me was good and encouraged me to do again. This time, she was breathing deeply with me, holding both of my hands with hers now.

"The nominations are probably starting now, come on let's bite the bullet and watch together," she said shaking my hands excitedly and kissing me.

"Or I distract myself and focus on anything other than the nominations... If my phone goes ballistic then it's good news, if it's not, then it's not," I said shaking my head and groaning.

I'm surprised those words came out of my mouth just now if I'm honest. I guess Y/N's pep talk gave me the confidence to give myself a pep talk.

"You know... We keep getting caught off guard or we're both busy or Harry is with us or I'm constantly working but we're actually free for a few hours and alone... I'm thinking maybe sex would be the perfect distraction for you," she grinned, drawing delicate patterns along my arm.

"Wait, really? Yeah fuck, this is perfect. Are you sure?" I asked, trying not to look overtly eager. She nodded.

It's really bizarre. We still haven't slept with each other yet. And it's because every time we plan to or try to, the universe decides to fuck us over. At the start, I didn't want our first time together to be under the influence of alcohol. We also didn't want to be in public. We didn't want to be too tired either so after work was kind of ruled out. And we didn't want Harry to hear the first time and roast us.

Then we gave up and decided to just fucking do it. We got close after the Bond wrap party, but we were very drunk and I couldn't get my cock up. Then we stayed at my parents house. Then we had Harry and his mates stay here. It's been a busy fucking time.

So yeah, now might actually work.

I bent down and scooped Y/N over my shoulder, jogging into my bedroom and placing her down on the bed as we both were laughing. It kind of seemed a little lame how excited we both were, we finally had time to screw each other.

"Fuck the Golden Globes," she smiled up at me.

"Exactly, fuck the Golden Globes."